


The Path Through Mirkwood

by octopus_fool



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Body Horror, Bugs & Insects, Community: hobbit_kink, Hallucinations, Horror, M/M, Medical Procedures, Mild Gore, Mushrooms, Oviposition, Wasps
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-16
Updated: 2015-03-08
Packaged: 2018-02-21 10:23:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 24
Words: 29,796
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2464805
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/octopus_fool/pseuds/octopus_fool
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The things Thorin’s company encounters in Mirkwood are beyond their worst nightmares. As Fíli’s uncle says, the faster they travel, the sooner they will leave the forest and all its horrors behind – if they manage to....</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Wasp

**Author's Note:**

> Written as a fill for [this prompt](http://hobbit-kink.livejournal.com/7346.html?thread=16260274#t16260274) on the hobbit kink meme.

Moisture hung in the air as Fíli sharpened his swords. He tried to ignore the dripping of the trees around him, vast, looming shapes in the twilit forest. In every other situation, Fíli would have thought it to be a rainy nightfall, but this was Mirkwood. The gloom had been much the same ever since they entered it on a sunny morning, which seemed years ago. Balin said it had only been six days.

The gloom was doing nobody’s temper any favours and the reason Fíli had moved away from the company had been an argument with his uncle. Fíli couldn’t even remember what had started it, but there had been shouting and Fíli thought fists might have flown for the first time ever between them if Dwalin and Bofur had not held them back.

They had come to a stop shortly afterwards for a brief rest and lunch. Fíli had walked a few steps away to avoid the awkward silence. He had decided to sharpen his swords, just to have something to stop his hands from shaking in anger. 

The others were within sight, not that there was much choice when they couldn’t leave the path. He crouched on the mossy ground, not wanting to lean against one of the slimy tree trunks. From time to time, a drop of water hit him and Fíli flinched. There was an occasional rustling in the forest and sometimes, he noticed some of the glowing eyes watching him from in between the foliage. They always disappeared as soon as he looked at them. The company had long since realized the eyes posed no immediate danger, but they still set everyone on edge. 

The clanking of spoons against bowls drifted over to Fíli and he knew he would soon have to return to the group to eat. 

There was a rustling above him. Fíli looked up. The trails of lichen that hung from the trees like long, greenish beards swung slightly but there was nothing else to be seen. Perhaps there was a breeze up there, Fíli thought. A breeze would be wonderful; they were all tired of the stifling, motionless air. Fíli had thought they would quickly stop noticing the smell of old leaves and mould, but they didn’t.

Fíli wanted to return to sharpening his sword but he noticed Bofur making his way towards him. Bofur was balancing two steaming bowls and Fíli smiled despite himself. Trust his fiancée to give him a few more minutes of quiet before he had to return to the presence of his uncle.  
Bofur returned his smile and Fíli found himself reminded of just how much he loved those dimples and the crinkles at the corners of Bofur’s eyes.

And then Bofur’s smile faded into a horrified expression.  
“Behind you, Fíli! Look out!”

Before Fíli could turn around, he felt something settle on his head and there was a sharp pain between his neck and his head.

Bofur ran towards him, hurling the bowls he carried at whatever was attacking Fíli. Fíli was hit with his share of hot soup as well, but before Fíli could even raise his arms, his attacker let go. And then he saw it.

The largest wasp Fíli had ever seen flew towards Bofur. It was entirely black and almost the length of Fíli’s lower arm. Fíli wanted to grab his swords and jump up to rush to Bofur’s aid, but his legs crumbled beneath him and would not obey. His swords slipped from his hands and as he sagged sideways, Fíli could only watch helplessly as Bofur tried to defend himself against the wasp. 

Bofur had forgotten his mattock with the others and it didn’t take long before the wasp managed to sting Bofur’s neck as well. Bofur sagged to the ground and his hat slid off. The wasp had to take to the air briefly. It repositioned itself and sunk its stinger into Bofur’s flesh again, this time between his shoulder blades. 

Suddenly, Fíli’s field of vision was filled with shouting dwarves, swinging swords and axes. The wasp must have flown away since the dwarves spread out. Fíli guessed they were forming a protective circle around him and Bofur. Kíli crouched down in front of Fíli.

“Are you alright, Fíli?”

Fíli wanted to answer, but his muscles would not move.

“Fíli? Say something, Fíli! Oh, Mahal!” Kíli reeled back. “I think he’s dead!”

Dwalin came into view and crouched in front of Fíli, while Kíli’s panicked babbling continued. There was a hand on Fíli’s wrist and one hovering in front of his nose and mouth. 

“No lad, he’s breathing and has a pulse. He’s alive.”

“So is Bofur,” came Óin’s voice. Fíli felt the weight of an entire mountain lift from his heart.

“We need to move!” Thorin commanded. “We don’t know if it is coming back. Dwalin, you carry Fíli. Dori, take Bofur. Everybody else, the supplies, and keep an eye out in case that thing returns. Move!”

Fíli was lifted onto Dwalin’s shoulders like a sack of coal. He felt oddly relaxed, even though he knew the position ought to be uncomfortable. The moss- and fungus-covered tree trunks rushed by in a dark green whirr. Fíli still couldn’t move, but he felt oddly calm. Being jostled on Dwalin’s back made him drowsy and he wondered if it was perhaps a side effect of the sting. Fíli found he didn’t care and started nodding off.


	2. Awaking

Fíli woke abruptly when he was set down. His tongue was heavy and his head hurt. He sat up and his brother’s worried face swam into focus. 

“Fíli? Are you alright? Are you hurt?”

Fíli got up despite Kíli’s protests and staggered a few steps, vaguely aware he wasn’t exactly moving in a straight line.

“’m fine. Jush hadda few beersh more ‘n I shou’ve.”

Fíli stumbled over a root and fell to the ground again. Thorin and Kíli rushed to his side worriedly.

“Shtupi’ tree…” He giggled and glared up at the offending plant. It had a dripping green beard. Oh.

“I wasn’ a’ the tavern, was I?” Fíli asked. 

“No, we’re still in Mirkwood,” Thorin said. “Can you remember what happened?”

Fíli wrinkled his brow in thought. “There was a giant wasp and it shtung me. Tha’s why I’m feelin’ drunk isn’ it?”

“Most likely,” Thorin nodded.

“Is Bofur alrigh’?” Fíli asked. “It go’ ‘im too. I wanned to help him but I couldn’ move.”

“He’s still asleep, but he doesn’t seem much worse than you did a few minutes ago. Bifur and Bombur are taking care of him. We’ll help you over when he wakes up.”

“Tha’s good then, isn’t it?” Fíli looked at Thorin’s tense face. Kíli looked like he was about to start crying. “Why‘re you looking at me like tha’? What’s wrong?”

“I just… you… you weren’t moving! You didn’t even blink; just lay there with open eyes and staring at nothing!” Kíli’s eyes were now brimming with tears. Fíli stretched out an arm and Kíli sank down onto the ground as well, hugging Fíli. “I thought… you just looked so… I thought you were dead!”

“You had us worried,” Thorin agreed gruffly and put a hand on Fíli’s shoulder. “And I... I shouldn’t have argued with you over something so trivial. Forgive me.”

Fíli pulled him down into a hug as well. “I love you both, y’know.”

Kíli snorted. “Now you really do sound drunk.”

After a while, Fíli pulled away. “I really want to see how Bofur’s doing. ’m feeling a lo’ less dizzy, so I don’ think walking will be much of a problem anymore.”

Thorin helped Fíli up and the three of them made their way over to Bofur and his family. Bofur was still lying there motionlessly as his brother and cousin hovered nearby. Óin was taking a look at the stings.

“How is he?” Fíli asked. 

Óin shrugged his shoulders. “He managed to close his eyes a while ago and he has stirred once or twice, so I think he’s mainly sleeping it off. The sting in his neck doesn’t look too bad, but the lower one is swollen.”

Fíli took a look at Bofur’s exposed back. An area about half the size of his palm was raised and slightly lumpy but pale. Only the small puncture wound itself looked slightly red.

“I’d say it’s slightly infected,” Óin continued, “but it isn’t red or hot to the touch as inflammations usually are. We’ll just have to keep an eye on it during the next couple of days. I’d like to have another look at your sting as well. How are you feeling?”

“My neck’s a bi’ sore and itches and my head hurts. I also feel ’s though I’ve had quite a few beers, but tha’s starting to wear off.”

“Hmm... that sounds much better than we expected at first.” Óin parted Fíli’s hair to look at his neck. “It’s still a bit red, but it already looks better than when I first checked it.”

At that moment, Bofur began stirring and blinked hazily.

“Ugh.. wha’s gn’ on? Wh’appn’?” He sat up.

“Bofur! Are you alright? How do you feel?” Bombur asked anxiously. Bifur just patted Bofur’s head and muttered something unintelligible. 

“’Everythin’s spinnin’. Feel a bi’ si’.” He squeezed his eyes shut again.

“D’you want to lie down again?” Fíli asked. Bofur nodded and they helped him settle back onto the bedroll. 

“Fi? Y’a’ri’? The wash ‘tacked ye.”

“I’m fine. What about you? How’s your back feel?”

Bombur and Bifur hovered nearby but didn’t seem to mind letting Fíli ask the questions. Bifur fiddled with Bofur’s hat which he held in his hands. Fíli was glad someone had picked the hat up; Bofur loved that ridiculous thing.

“M’ back? ‘S my head tha’ feelsh like wash hi’ by a rock.”

Fíli began gently massaging Bofur’s head.

“Does that help a bit?”

“Mmh.”

“Thank you,” Fíli said. “You know, for helping me against tha’ wasp.”

“Ye’d’ve done th’ same.” Bofur suddenly giggled. “I ‘tacked i’ wi’ shoup, din’ I?”

Fíli had to laugh as well. “Yes, you did. Maybe try throwin’ bread or nuts next time; it still seemed to prefer dwarf.”

Fíli realised he was feeling a bit drowsy again and curled up against Bofur’s back. “Is this alright? Or am I hurting the stings?”

“No, feels goo’.” Bofur snuggled back against him. Fíli pressed a gentle kiss against the side of his neck and draped an arm over Bofur.

“You’re lovely, you know that?”

“An’ ye’re a sop bu’ I love ye for i’.”

Fíli gave him a soft nudge. “Look who’s talking.”

He was vaguely aware of the hushed voices of their friends and family.

“They seem to be doing alright. I think we can just leave them like this for now.”


	3. Recovery

The gloom of the forest was slightly lighter when Fíli woke up again. His head had stopped hurting and he no longer felt inebriated. He sat up and realised he was ravenous. Small wonder, he thought, the last meal he had eaten had been breakfast the previous morning. 

Woken by Fíli’s movements, Bofur sat up as well. “I can’t believe we slept so long. It can’t have been much later than late afternoon when we made camp. That horrible wasp really got us good, didn’t it?”

Fíli nodded. “Too bad the others didn’t end up killing that thing.”

“Well, at least we got away. I don’t even want to know what it would have done with us otherwise. Probably bitten us to mouth-sized bits and then had quite a feast. I watched a normal wasp, you know, one of the black and yellow ones, eat a slug once. It didn’t stand a chance. Two bites and the little thing’s guts were spilling from its body. Pretty gruesome.”

Fíli shuddered. “We really are lucky the others chased it away in time. I don’t fancy being a wasp’s lunch.”

“Talking about food: I’m starving. I’d say it’s just about time for breakfast anyway.”

They made their way over to their packs, where Balin, who had had the last watch, joined them.

“Up and about again, lads?”

“We couldn’t let Dwalin and Dori carry us all the way to Erebor, could we?” Bofur grinned. 

“On second thought, perhaps we should eat quickly and then pretend to be asleep again...” Fíli pretended to contemplate.

“Don’t you dare, laddies,” Dwalin said, emerging from his own bedroll. “I dare say you’ve had quite a few roasts since you were the little dwarfling I last carried and it shows. Besides, I don’t want to know what that would do to your uncle.”

Fíli sobered. “He did seem fairly shaken yesterday.”

“Well, you seem to be alright now,” Balin said. 

Fíli and Bofur nodded. “The headache is gone and I no longer feel as though I drank my way through an entire brewery,” Fíli said. 

By now, the others were stirring too. Óin came over to check their stings.

“It seems to be healing well,” he said to Fíli. “There’s just a scab and it shouldn’t cause any problems. But let me know if anything is the matter.”

The sting on Bofur’s neck was also healing, but the one between his shoulder blades was still raised and lumpy.

“Is it causing you any pain or discomfort?” Óin asked.

Bofur shook his head. “I don’t even notice it’s there unless I run my hand over it.”

“Hmm. At least it’s really not inflamed but we’ll keep an eye on it,” Óin said. “If there is no change by tomorrow, I may have to do something about it.”

Bofur grimaced. “I’m sure it will be fine. In any case you wouldn’t have to do anything drastic about it, like cutting it open, would you?”

“I hope not. We’ll just have to wait and see,” Óin replied.

 

After a quick breakfast, they started the day’s march. 

Everybody was tenser than they had been previously. They pointed out each time a pair of eyes, and in a few unsettling cases, three eyes, appeared. The shadows of the forest seemed to press in even closer and their hands went to their weapons whenever something rustled in the forest.

Bilbo jumped whenever one of the large black squirrels skittered up one of the tree trunks. Nobody dared to venture far from the company. 

Towards evening, Fíli realised that he had seen Bofur rubbing between his shoulder blades a few times.

“Is it hurting you?” He asked. 

“No, it’s just a bit itchy.”

When they made camp a little bit later, Óin had another look at it. Fíli hovered over his shoulder.  
The lump where the sting had been was gone and the skin there now looked a bit like an old blister.

Óin wrinkled his forehead. “Well, I’d say we take it as a good sign. Itching can often be a sign of healing, which I think is the most likely explanation here. Let me know if there are any changes.”


	4. Luminescent

The next few days were fairly uneventful. They travelled at a good speed but nothing about their surroundings indicated they were making any progress.

Ori asked Bilbo to teach him the names of the tree species he knew, but the forest was not especially diverse. Ori soon knew all the species they were walking past in the gloom and muttered their names under his breath.

“Oak, oak, ash, elm, oak. Pine, elm, pine, oak, pine...”

“Will you shut your mouth,” Glóin grumbled. “I never thought you would care for overgrown vegetables.”

Ori hunched his shoulders and remained silent. The company marched on wordlessly, the mood even worse than before. Only Bofur was still cheerful and hummed under his breath. He didn’t seem to mind the darkness pressing in on them from all sides.

Fíli shuddered whenever one of the many cobwebs snapped because he walked into it, the trails of thread brushing across his face. When they stopped in the evenings, everyone muttered and grumbled at the amount of cobwebs, leaves and small insects that always managed to get stuck in their hair and beards.

At least they had packed enough food from Beorn’s that they could travel for almost two months without starving. Beorn had said they wouldn’t need that long to cross the forest, but as the days dragged on, Fíli became less certain that the forest would ever end and more thankful for their heavy, food-laden packs.

After a while, Fíli started to feel like the forest was changing. Perhaps the constant darkness was driving him mad or his eyes were simply adjusting to the lack of light. Whatever the cause, he soon thought parts of the forest were _glowing_. Not much, but it was giving off an eerie light. 

At first, Fíli only noticed it in some of the mushrooms. It was an easy mistake to make, he thought. Their whiteness amongst the gloom had stood out ever since they had stepped into the forest. Of course his eyes would start seeing them as glowing when they hadn't seen proper light for days and weeks. But then, the slime on the tree trunks also began giving off a faint light. Soon, the entire forest was glowing softly in different colours. 

Fíli rubbed his eyes and then noticed the others in the Company were also staring at the trees in suspicion.

"Bilbo?" Ori asked tentatively. "Are the trees supposed to do that?"

Bilbo shook his head. "I've never seen anything like that before."

"I have," Nori muttered under his breath, careful not to let either of his brothers hear. "But only after a few deep swigs of Gadi's special mushroom ale."

Bofur snorted and Fíli had to suppress a laugh as well. 

They hadn't eaten anything from the forest, except that awful black squirrel Kíli had shot on the second day. None of them had wanted to repeat the experience. That had been over a week ago, so that could hardly be the cause. Perhaps the very air was poisoned, but their skin still had the same colour as always, unless a drop of ooze splashed down from a tree onto it. It had to be the forest itself that was glowing.

There wasn't much they could do but carry on anyway. 

Fíli's uncle seemed to see it the same way. "Alright everybody. The forest seems to be playing tricks on our eyes, but that does not really change anything. Do not leave the path, do not eat anything that comes from the forest and keep an eye out for anything that might be dangerous. The faster we travel, the sooner we will be out of here."

They walked faster after that, but still stared at the otherworldly colours in wonder and suspicion. Kíli, Ori and Bifur tripped over tree roots a few times because they were watching the shimmering lichens instead of their feet.

That night was the first night they were not enveloped in complete darkness. The mushrooms glowed in pulsating oranges, reds and blues. The slime oozing down the tree trunks gave off a murky greenish light and the lichens trailing overhead were vaguely yellow. 

There were still glowing eyes in the darkness, but they weren't quite as apparent as they had been before. Fíli was not sure if that was a relief or if it made possible danger harder to spot. 

Insects skittered over the trees and mushrooms, some glowing as well while others were merely black shadows on the shimmering surfaces. 

They ate their dinner watching the eerie spectacle around them. Fíli noticed Bofur eyeing his plate and wordlessly moved some of his food to Bofur's already empty plate.

"Thanks," Bofur muttered.

"Look," Fíli nudged Bofur in the side when they had finished eating. He pointed at a pale, silvery strand seemingly creating itself in midair. A second strand attached itself to the first one, and then a third.

Kíli seemed to have noticed as well and got up to investigate. Fíli and Bofur watched as he drew closer and closer. Suddenly, Kíli leapt back with a shriek and tumbled to the ground, alerting everyone's attention. Thorin, Dwalin and Glóin leapt up and drew their weapons. The rest of the company also had their hands on their weapons, ready to draw them as well.

"What happened?" Thorin demanded. "Did something attack you?"

"N-no... but there's a _huge_ spider there! It's almost as big as my face!"

Thorin gestured to Glóin and he hurriedly lit the torch they kept at hand in case of an emergency. Glóin and Dwalin inspected the thread but it seemed that the spider had made a hasty retreat. They quickly hacked through the threads with their axes, not wanting to touch the threads with their hands in case the spider came back. Then they extinguished the torch. It had already started to draw large black moths into their camp. One of them fluttered against Bilbo’s face and made him screech. 

Thorin turned back to Kíli and helped him up. "I thought you would have learnt from the attack on Fíli and Bofur,” Thorin reprimanded him. “Don't go wandering off alone, even if it's only a few steps. We don't know what's out there and what can happen."

"Yes, Thorin. I'm sorry."

"Well, you were lucky this time. Just don't push your luck."

Thorin gripped Kíli's shoulder and led him back to the others.

 

Kíli sat down between Ori and Bilbo, looking downcast and shaken. 

Fíli leaned against Bofur, who wrapped his arms around Fíli. Fíli ran his hands up and down Bofur's hairy arms, cursing the lack of privacy on this journey. 

"What are you thinking about?" Bofur murmured against his ear.

"How nice it will be to have some privacy when we reclaim Erebor. I'm sure there will be a nice chamber where we won't be disturbed for a day or two."

"Aye, that would be lovely," Bofur replied.

Bofur's arm twitched beneath Fíli's hand.

"What was that?" Fíli asked.

"My arm?"

Fíli nodded against Bofur's chest.

"Just a muscle twitch. It's happened a few times lately, but it's just slightly annoying. Nothing to worry about."

They fell into silence. 

"It would be nice to see the sky again," Bofur said after a while. "We could be watching the stars right now."

"Spoken like a true dwarf," Fíli snickered.

"Hey, that's mean." Bofur shoved him slightly.

"Sorry. I know what you mean. I wish we at least hadn’t lost our entire pipe weed in the Misty Mountains. I can't wait to finally reach the other side of the forest, and we aren't even halfway there yet. We still haven't reached the river Beorn said marked the middle of the forest."

Bofur groaned. "Let's not think about that."

"Look!" Fíli said, pointing. "Fireflies! Kíli and I used to catch them when we were young and our uncle took us on trips for training."

He reached out his hands to capture one.

"You probably don't want to..."

Bofur's warning was too late as Fíli yelped and quickly wiped the hot, stinking liquid from his right hand.

Thorin looked at them. "Is everything alright?"

"Yes, I just have a... a bit of a... hangnail!"

Fíli felt Bofur quiver from suppressed laughter. Thorin gave Fíli a reprimanding look but seemed satisfied with his answer.

"Really? A hangnail is all you could come up with?" Bofur whispered when Thorin had turned away. 

"You try coming up with a good excuse when your hand hurts! I can't believe even the fireflies in this place are vicious! A bit more concern would have been nice, by the way."

"Sorry. I just reckoned you couldn't be hurt too badly when you were telling poor lies to Thorin. But let me have a look at your hand."

Fíli held out his hand. A big blister was starting to form on his palm.

"Ugh. That looks painful," Bofur said.

"It's not too bad. It only hurt at the very beginning."

"Are you sure you don't want to go to Óin?" Bofur asked and Fíli could hear the grin in his voice. "Who knows, perhaps it needs to be amputated. You know, with a great big saw and..."

"Oh, shut it!" Fíli said and gave Bofur a light smack.

Finally, they settled into their bedrolls and tried to fall asleep without thinking about giant wasps, large spiders and awful fireflies. Around them, the forest rustled and crackled as the feet of a million tiny creatures scuttled through their luminous surroundings and bats fluttered and clicked overhead.

Occasionally, Bofur's arm twitched against Fíli's chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The firefly is slightly based off the [Bombardier Beetle](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bombardier_beetle), because you don't have to go all the way to Mirkwood to encounter fascinating insects. :)


	5. Déjà Vu

The glow of the forest was slightly less unsettling in the morning. The night had passed without any incident but still, most of the company were not well rested. 

They ate their breakfast in silence. Fíli's eyebrows rose slightly when he heard Bofur quietly ask Bombur for another slice of bread as they were packing their belongings. He soon put it out of his mind again.

 

A couple of days later, Fíli became aware of a rustling in the trees above them. He watched uneasily. The lichens swayed slightly. Fíli stopped abruptly and grabbed his swords. Balin nearly walked into him.

"What's wrong, laddie?" He asked, following Fíli's eyes.

"The lichens... shortly before we were attacked by the wasp, the lichens were also moving."

The other dwarves had come to a halt as well and quickly shuffled into a protective circle. Their backs together, they stared into the darkly luminescent forest nervously.

"Is there another one?" Glóin asked, not having heard Fíli's answer.

"There might be. The lichens moved like they did last time." 

A few trees away, the lichens swayed. Everybody tensed. The lichens stopped moving. 

"Where has it gone?" Dori whispered.

Bifur grunted and gestured at a patch of lichens in the opposite direction. It too stopped moving.

They looked around.

"There!" Kíli and Bombur said at the same time, pointing in different directions.

Bilbo groaned. "Somebody please tell me there isn't more than one!"

Nobody replied. They were all too focussed on the trees surrounding them. 

After a while, several different patches of lichen moved again, almost at once.

"Mahal, how many are there?" Dwalin asked.

The company continued waiting motionlessly, tensing whenever something moved.

There was the slightest shifting of air around them as more lichens moved once again.

After a few more moments during which nothing happened, Ori cleared his throat nervously.

"Um, is it possible that there's simply a breeze up there?"

They kept their eyes on the motionless forest. Then the lichens above the path east blew towards them, one after the other, before swaying back and forth. The slightest of breezes whispered across their faces.

"Oh Mahal, it really is only a breeze," Kíli said with a shaky, high-pitched laugh. 

The dwarves relaxed.

"Time to get going again!" Thorin commanded. "But keep an eye open as always! I'd rather have a few false alarms than not be warned when something really does attack."

The company started moving again and Fíli let out a relieved breath. His knees felt wobbly and as though they would give in at any moment. He realised he was shaking.

Thorin stepped next to Fíli and slung a supporting arm around his shoulders. 

"Let's go. You know what I always say."

"The faster we travel, the sooner we will be out of here." Fíli smiled thankfully at his uncle.

Thorin only let go of his shoulders when Fíli felt his legs were steadier again and he had stopped trembling.

 

As they travelled along, the luminescence of the forest began to grow less again. Fíli had thought that the breeze would bring them fresh air instead of the stale, musty air they had grown used to. Instead, it only seemed to whirl up every single spore of mould in the entire forest. 

As the wind grew stronger, Bilbo, Dori, Ori and Glóin began coughing. Fíli's throat felt sore and his eyes itched. Some of the other dwarves also had puffy-looking eyes. They tried tying clothes over their mouths, but it barely helped.

All of them were glad when evening came. The wind hadn't gotten better, but at least they didn't have to move while having trouble breathing.

They ate a quick meal. Fíli gave some of his portion to Bofur as had become his habit. To his surprise he saw Bifur shovelling some of his food onto Bofur's plate as well.

Apparently, Kíli had also noticed. "Why are you getting extra food? Is this some family thing and you are trying to out-eat Bombur?"

Bifur bristled and Bofur shrank into himself.

Fíli gave his brother an angry glare. "I don't think that is any of your concern!"

Kíli stared at his brother for a moment. Then guilt flickered across his face.

"I'm sorry. That was inappropriate and I shouldn't have said it."

"It's alright, really," Bofur said. 

Bifur stilled glared at Kíli, who hurried off as soon as he could.

Fíli, Bifur and Bofur sat in awkward silence for a moment before Bofur spoke up.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have been asking the two of you for food. I know you need the food yourselves, but I have just been so hungry lately. I know that's not even really an excuse..." he trailed off.

Bifur patted Bofur on the back so hard he nearly keeled over and then began signing. /Do not worry. I have learnt to live with less and this is the least I can do after you nursed me back to health./

"I don't give you more than I can spare. I'm just worried about you," Fíli said.

"I'm just really hungry; I'm fine otherwise. Perhaps my body is just having a harder time than the others in coping with the constant travelling."

"I hope so. You would let me know if anything is the matter?"

Bofur nodded.


	6. The Storm

Some time that night, Fíli woke up with a start. He sat up and looked around but the night was pitch-black again. The forest creaked and groaned. The owls that had often kept him awake with their ominous calls had fallen silent but Fíli heard something suspiciously like howls in the distance.

"What's going on?" He asked quietly into the darkness as a gust of wind whipped his hair into his face.

"The wind has been growing into a storm, nothing more," Dwalin's voice answered and Fíli remembered that Dwalin had drawn the second watch. "Try to go back to sleep, laddie. I'll wake you if anything happens."

"What about the howls?"

"There must be a hollow tree that the wind is whistling through. The sounds have only been growing fiercer, not closer. Besides, wargs and wolves sound different than that. No need to worry."

Now that Fíli was slightly more awake, he realised that Dwalin was right. Fíli settled back into his bedroll but he couldn't go back to sleep. The wind blew in gusts and he could hear thunder rumble somewhere above the trees, even though the flash of lightning rarely penetrated the tree tops.

The other dwarves began waking up as well as the wind increased. At first small branches were torn off by the storm, then increasingly larger ones.

They quickly rolled up their bedrolls and put them back into their leather bags to prevent them from getting entirely soaked by the rain that had started pouring down. They gathered their packs together as well to make sure none of the lighter ones could be blown away.

The dwarves huddled together, drenched to the bones and trying to shield themselves against the falling vegetation. Soggy leaves splattered against them and small twigs were blown against them with so much force that their skin smarted. 

Suddenly, there was a great rush of noise growing closer. Fíli could here splintering wood and the sound of trees crashing to the ground.

“Take cover!” Dwalin yelled, his voice barely audible above the din. 

Fíli had a brief moment to consider that there wasn’t really anywhere to take cover and then the trees came crashing down around them. The company shielded their heads as best they could as parts of the falling trees whipped around them. Luckily, the trunks and major branches missed them as they cowered on the ground. 

The dwarves quickly made sure nobody was injured before falling into silence again, huddled in whatever position made the weather easiest to bear. Finally, the wind died down a bit and only the pouring rain and the occasional gust of wind remained. 

Towards morning, a few dwarves dozed off leaning against the packs or their companions, but most of them sat awake, waiting for enough light to continue their journey ill-rested. Fíli could hear Bilbo’s teeth chattering in the dark. There was some rustling and Bofur shifted away from Fíli.

“Come here, I don’t want you to freeze to death,” Bofur whispered, “and this way, you’ll at least be warm from one side.”

“Two sides,” Ori added and there was some more rustling. Fíli shifted after Bofur as well. The chattering of Bilbo’s teeth slowly became less.

Finally, the grey outlines of the trees became visible as dawn approached. The twisted shapes of the branches reminded Fíli of skeletal hands reaching out for them. Most of the leaves had been torn off and lay about in great, soggy clumps on the forest floor.  
Slowly, the greys of the night faded to the dull colours of the daytime forest.

“We should be able to travel now,” Thorin decided and they woke the sleeping members of the company to have a quick breakfast.

As they started travelling, they quickly noticed that the path was even more unpleasant when wet. The thick layer of wet leaves was treacherously slippery and in some places, the mud went up to their ankles. The dwarves’ boots were soon covered in thick plaques of the stuff, weighing down their feet. Bilbo complained loudly about the mud squelching between his toes and soiling the curls on his feet beyond recognition. Each step turned into a struggle against the sucking sludge.

Several times, they narrowly avoided twisting an ankle or falling into the mud after tripping over a twig or branch hidden under leaves or the mud. The company frequently had to walk in serpentine lines to get around fallen branches. 

More often than not, this was not possible when an entire tree had crashed onto the path. When they were not able to simply crawl beneath it, they stopped, threw their packs over the tree and began scaling the trunk that was often thicker than the height of a fully grown dwarf. Once one of them had managed to clamber up the trunk, he pulled the others up as well and then they let themselves drop down the other side, picked up their packs and continued walking until the next tree blocked their way. 

Fíli climbed up the trunk of a fallen pine using branches as footholds, resin sticking to his hands. To his left, Nori had already reached to the top of the trunk and was reaching out to help Bofur up. 

Fíli reached the top of the trunk as well and turned around to help Kíli up.

“What’s that in your arm?” Nori asked Bofur, looking at his arm.

“Just a twitching muscle,” Bofur replied, reaching down for Ori’s hand and letting his sleeve fall over the twitch in the process.

“Are you sure?” Nori asked. “In Harad, there are flies that lay their eggs under people’s skin and when the maggot hatches, it twitches and squirms until it breaks through the skin to have a hole to breath through. That doesn’t mean the host is rid of it yet, though. The maggot continues feeding on the person’s blood until it is fully grown and only then lets itself drop. It has little hooked suckers that prevent it from being pulled out. If you want to get it out, you have to cut open the skin to do so.”

“That’s awful! I couldn’t stand that, much less somebody carving me open with a knife,” Bofur shuddered. “I can just imagine them having to scrape around to unhook the maggot. I think I’d rather bear the maggot than have somebody cut me open.”

“You’re just joking about that, aren’t you? Do you think you can still scare me like when I was a little dwarfling?” Ori asked his brother.

“No, those things really exist,” Nori said. “I saw one man with a least a dozen of them poking out of his back and quite a few others with the scars still on their skin. I really wouldn’t want anything like that. I’d keep an eye on it if I were you, Bofur, just to be sure.”

“Oh, stop it,” Bofur said, jumping down from the tree. “It’s just a muscle twitch.”

“Do you always have to be this way?” Ori asked his brother. “Why do you always have to pretend things are worse than they really are?”

Nori just shrugged.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The charming creatures Nori describes in this chapter are based on [botflies](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dermatobia_hominis) (although the method he describes to get rid of them is not the best).


	7. The River

Luckily for them, the storm had only left a relatively narrow path of destruction through the forest and they were soon able to travel again without having to climb over fallen trees.

Several days later, they finally reached the river that flowed through the forest. It lay before them like a dark, motionless mirror as they pondered silently how to cross it. Beorn’s words of warning echoed in their minds. Nobody was tempted to touch the forest river’s water but they seemed to be at an impasse. At least Fíli saw no way to cross the river except by swimming and that would mean rather more contact with the water than any of them wanted.

As it was, they stood in the gloom and glared at the water. Thorin paced back and forth as Fíli wondered at the perfect stillness of the water. He tossed in a leaf and was surprised at how quickly it was carried in the direction that Fíli wouldn’t have guessed was downstream.

Kíli stopped his own pacing and watched the leaf disappear into the darkness.

“Huh. I didn’t think the river would have that much of a current. I wonder how deep it is.”

He knelt down, pulled a pebble from between the roots of a tree and flicked it towards the river. It skipped three times before it disappeared into the darkness.

Kíli sighed. “You know, I think this is the most fun I’ve had since we entered this awful forest...”  
He trailed off as Thorin stormed towards them.

“What were you thinking?! Do you want to wake something with your splashing about? You should be thinking of ways to cross instead of fooling about!”

“I doubt anything would want to live in that water. But I won’t do it again,” Kíli replied, his shoulders sagging.

“I hope so. Even if there’s nothing in the water, the noise could draw Mahal knows what from the forest.”

“Leave the lad alone,” Óin chimed in. “It’s just water and I wouldn’t even have noticed the splash if I hadn’t been looking. I think there’s no harm in having a little fun.”

“Oh, do you?” Thorin said, his voice rising. “Just because you didn’t hear it doesn’t mean half the forest didn’t either. In fact...”

“I think I found a boat!” Bilbo’s call prevented things from escalating further.

Calling it a boat was a little optimistic though, Fíli thought. There was a plank missing and the wood was slimy with moss. In a few places, tiny mushrooms and seedlings were pushing through the wood.

Still, it was better than nothing. In a combined effort, they tipped it over to empty it of water. Bilbo instructed Kíli where best to shoot his arrow with an old rope attached. The second attempt was successful and they managed to get the rope across the river. After fastening the other end of the rope to a tree, Nori got into the boat and pulled himself across the river. When he reached the other side, he tied the rope more securely around a tree and pulled the boat back across to ferry the others over the river in groups of two. 

Fíli and Bofur were almost last to cross, with only Bombur still waiting on the western bank. Fíli watched the dark water beneath the boat with trepidation. Like most dwarves, he had never felt at home on the water and this river was even more eerie than most. The water glided beneath the boat silently, but Fíli and Nori had to make quite an effort to keep the boat from drifting away from the rope. Bofur sat on the other side of the boat to keep it in balance.  
Bofur didn’t seem to be disturbed by the river. He was cheerfully humming a song about a picnic and all the different kinds of food he would eat, tapping his fingers in time to the rhythm.  
Fíli looked at the bank towards which they were heading. He couldn’t see much in the gloom. His companions were either sorting through their packs, watching the boat’s progress or trying to get some rest. Bilbo was looking up at the trees, which seemed a bit different to Fíli from the ones they had previously passed. 

Fíli glanced back at Bofur and startled. Still humming cheerfully, Bofur was picking away at the planks of the boat, prying away large pieces of wood and tossing them into the river. 

“What are you doing?” Fíli demanded. “Do you want the boat to sink and all of us to drown?!”

Bofur looked up in surprise. “What? No, of course not. Why would you...” He looked down at his hands and the side of the boat that was now even more unstable than before. “Oh. I didn’t realise... I’m so sorry.” Bofur bit his lip and folded his hands so they were no longer touching the boat.

Nori scowling and Fíli glancing at the water even more nervously than before, they continued their journey across the river. By the time they finally reached the bank, Bofur was already humming softly again. 

Sending nasty looks at Bofur, the other dwarves inspected the damage to the boat. Finally, they decided it was stable enough to send it back to get Bombur, as long as he and Nori avoided all unnecessary movements. They didn’t have much of a choice anyway.

Nori made it back across the river without any problems and the dwarves could faintly hear him explain the additional difficulty to Bombur. Finally, Fíli was able to make out the shape of the boat journeying towards them with Bombur sitting as still as possible.

“You’re almost there!” Kíli called to encourage Bombur, who was clearly terrified. 

At that moment, a huge white stag erupted from the bushes and leapt across the river in a jump longer than Fíli had even considered possible. Bombur startled and tipped towards the damaged side of the boat. He clutched at it, grappling as more wood broke off. Then he fell backwards into the water as the boat tipped over and drifted into the darkness, taking a fair amount of their food stores with it. 

Nori, limber as he was, had barely managed to clutch the rope and hoist himself onto it. Dwalin and Ori quickly reached out to him and helped him across the last bit of the river. 

The other’s combined efforts finally managed to pull Bombur out of the river, where he lay on the ground dripping and motionless. Under Óin’s instructions, they made sure Bombur spat out any water he had breathed in or swallowed. Then, they stood around Bombur anxiously, waiting for him to regain consciousness.

Bifur sat next to Bombur, patting his cheeks and pressing an old wooden toy into his hands.

Fíli looked around to find Bofur. Bofur was staring into the gloom, his shoulders hunched in that distinct way that Fíli knew meant he wanted to be left alone. 

Fíli turned back to Bombur. If Bofur wanted to deal with things this way, that was up to him.


	8. More Trials

When the gloom began turning even darker, Thorin spoke up. “As much as I want to wait here until Bombur is fine, I do not think it would be wise to spend the night next to the river. We will have to carry Bombur.”

There was quite a bit of muttering and grumbling, but Thorin held up a hand.

“I know we are all tired and wish to make greater speed, but we need to move on and Bombur is one of our company. That means he is coming with us. We will not abandon one of our own just because he is suddenly inconvenient. Anyone who thinks elsewise shall tell me so and be the first to turn back towards the Blue Mountains.”

The grumblers fell silent and a few nodded their assent. Bifur hugged Thorin, who froze and then awkwardly patted him on the back.

“Alright then. We should be able to carry him with four dwarves. Who will take the first shift together with me?” Thorin asked.

Bifur nodded and Dwalin stepped forward as well. So did Fíli. Together, they lifted Bombur from the ground and began carrying him down the forest path.

 

Any hopes that Bombur’s sleep would be short were dashed when he still couldn’t be roused in the morning. It was quickly decided that Dori would take over Bombur’s task of keeping track of the stores and dealing out the rations. 

Fíli was packing up his bedroll when he became aware of Dori cursing. 

“I’ve counted everything three times and I still keep ending up with far fewer rations than we ought to have left, even after accounting for the food we lost in the river.” 

The others took a look at the food that was still there, but the result remained the same. Dori decided that the rations would have to be smaller from then on. This in addition to Thorin announcing the shifts for carrying Bombur that day resulted in a little grumbling, but there were no major protests.

 

As they walked through the forest, Fíli realised that the trees had changed again, which must have been what Bilbo had been looking at when they had been crossing the river. There were now trees with long, smooth trunks together with the other trees. Some of them had normal leaves, but quite a few had leaves the colour of congealed blood. 

When Fíli pointed them out to Bofur, Bofur just shrugged. “They’re just trees. Who cares what colour their leaves are?”

He continued whistling his walking song.

That was when Fíli heard Bilbo yelp and curse. Fíli hurried over to him.

“What’s wrong?”

Bilbo was inspecting the underside of his left foot. A large, spiky-looking burr was buried in the tough skin. Bilbo gritted his teeth and pulled it out, drawing a few drops of blood. Bilbo looked at the blood in surprise.

“I’ve walked over broken glass before and nothing ever pierced the skin of my feet. I have never seen such monstrous beechnuts! I am sick and tired of this awful forest!” He glared at the trees Fíli had noticed earlier. 

Óin took a look at Bilbo’s foot and marvelled at the thickness of a hobbit’s soles. “I don’t want to know how far this would have gone into the flesh if a bare-footed dwarf had stepped on it. This burr could easily puncture a boot, so take care not to step on them.”

That was easier said than done, as the path was thickly covered in burrs in some places. 

It wasn’t long before Dwalin winced, a burr stuck in his boot and reaching into his foot. After that, they had to stop in regular intervals because somebody had missed a hidden burr and stepped in it. Before long, they were hobbling along, their mood even worse than before. 

Only Bofur didn’t seem to mind the burrs and didn’t even wince when pulling them out. He still seemed cheerful, even when Glóin began speculating behind them whether Bombur had been eating more than his share of food before falling into the river. In his stead, Fíli turned around and glared at him in defence of his future brother-in-law.

Glóin promptly fell silent, at least for as long as Fíli was in hearing distance. 

 

That evening, they made camp in an area with as few beeches as possible. They swatted the few remaining burrs aside with branches, laid out their bedrolls and settled down to eat their small meal. 

When they were done, Fíli curled himself around Bofur. He waited until the noises around them had quietened down a bit.

“You know you don’t have to put on a brave face in front of me. And I’m sure the others would also understand if you let your worry show.”

Bofur turned towards him, puzzled. “Worry about what?”

“About Bombur not waking up after falling into the river.”

“Oh.” Bofur shrugged. “I’m not really that worried, actually. I supposed it’s because we’ve already been through so much, with Bifur’s head and all. It will be alright in the end.”

“I wish Bifur had some of your optimism,” Fíli said, looking over at where Bifur was hovering over Bombur, making sure he got enough water from sucking on a moist cloth.

“I’ll talk to him tomorrow,” Bofur said, rolling over again.

Fíli nodded against his back. “That might not be a bad idea. And you know I’m always here for you, if you need an open ear or anything else.”

Bofur nodded. “I know. Thank you.”

Within minutes, Fíli could hear Bofur’s softly rumbling snores. He himself needed considerably longer to fall asleep. He couldn’t help but imagine what it would be like if Kíli, his mother or Thorin were in Bombur’s state. He didn’t think he could be as relaxed as Bofur was. Still, he supposed everybody reacted differently to bad luck and who was he to judge?


	9. Hunger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I passed my last university exam (well, more like presentation) today! So um, have a second chapter for the day! :D

Fíli woke to Dori cursing in a way that made him wonder if Dori had picked up some foul language from Nori or if it had perhaps been the other way round years ago. Fíli wormed his way out of his bedroll and hurried over to Dori. 

“What’s wrong?”

“There was some rye bread in this pack that I wanted to serve for breakfast and now it’s gone!”

Fíli opened his mouth but Dori anticipated his question. “Don’t you go asking me if I am sure that it was in that pack! I may only have taken over this task yesterday, but I know my supplies.”

“I just wanted to make sure,” Fíli said. He looked at the others who had gathered round. “Who was on watch tonight? Did you notice anything out of the ordinary?”

Dwalin and Ori came forward saying they hadn’t seen or heard anything unusual during their watches.

Kíli shifted from leg to leg awkwardly. “I’m afraid I fell asleep during my watch. I’m sorry.”

Thorin stepped forward from the back of the group from where he had been watching. “Need I remind you all that we keep watch during the night for a reason? There is nothing in this forest that is not potentially dangerous, which is why each of you needs to take their duty seriously. If you don’t, some bread going missing might look like nothing in comparison. I doubt any of you wants to be responsible for the deaths of your companions, am I right?”

They all nodded solemnly, Kíli looking like he wanted the ground to swallow him up.

 

They travelled quietly, not really in the mood for conversation. At noon, Bombur began snoring loudly and they briefly hoped it meant he could be woken from his unnatural sleep. Again, their hopes were dashed as all attempts to rouse him were in vain.

The remaining day passed uneventfully. That evening, they made camp in a small clearing that allowed them to see the sky through the trees for the first time in ages. 

 

It must have been in the middle of the night when a rustling woke Fíli. Cautiously, he opened his eyes, moving as little as possible so as not to give away that he was awake. Shifting subtly, he saw that someone had opened one of the packs and was searching through it. The person found what he was looking for and began eating. 

Fíli silently crawled out of his bedroll and walked over to the thief. 

“What are you doing?” Fíli asked when he was standing over him.

The other startled, dropped the piece of bread to the ground and quickly wiped the crumbs from his mouth. With a sinking feeling in his stomach, Fíli realised that the thief was Bofur. 

“Oh, hello Fíli. I was just checking that all the supplies were still here. I wouldn’t want them to go missing on my watch, would I?” Bofur laughed.

Fíli shook his head in disbelief. “I saw you. You were eating.”

“Oh that,” Bofur said, smiling. “I had some food left over from dinner. I saved it for my watch so I didn’t go hungry. It was right here in my pocket.”

“Why are you telling me lies?” Fíli asked, despairing. “I saw you take it from the pack.”

“I’m just so hungry,” Bofur said. “And now that Bombur isn’t eating, I figured it wouldn’t hurt if I took his ration. After all, I am his brother, so it ought to go to me.” 

Fíli shook his head. “The food isn’t one of Bombur’s belongings, it belongs to the group. You should know that. You heard the discussions the group had about the topic.”

Fíli turned away from Bofur, his mind whirling. In hindsight, he should have seen this coming, with the huge appetite Bofur had developed lately. Still, he had never thought Bofur would resort to stealing, even less when the group depended on the food. Bofur’s fairness had been one of the many reasons Fíli had been attracted to Bofur in the first place.

“Fíli?” Bofur asked softly and Fíli realised he had been staring into the night for a long while.

He took a deep breath, braced himself and turned back towards Bofur. “I’m sorry, Bofur. This is a matter that concerns the entire group. I have no choice but to tell Thorin.” 

“Bofur shook his head. “Please don’t! I will do whatever you want. I was just so hungry. I’m your fiancé. Please don’t do this to me!”

Fíli swallowed. “Thorin isn’t unreasonable. It is because I am your fiancé that I cannot impartially make a decision. And like I said, this concerns the entire group.”

Bofur grasped Fíli’s hand. “Please don’t.”

Fíli looked away. “I’m sorry, Bofur. I have to do this.”

He pulled his hand out of Bofur’s and walked over to Thorin’s bedroll, relieved when Bofur didn’t follow him. Fíli knelt down at Thorin’s side and gently touched his shoulder. 

“Uncle Thorin?” Fíli realised he had subconsciously reverted to the name he had called Thorin when he had still been a dwarfling.

Thorin sat upright and was awake within seconds. “What is it?”

Fíli swallowed. “I know who took the food.” He quickly recounted what had happened. When he was done, Thorin got up and went over to where Bofur still stood rooted next to the packs.  
Bofur answered Thorin’s questions, admitting he had stolen the food out of hunger. 

Thorin wrinkled his forehead. “The rations are small, but not so small that anybody needs to go hungry. Did you really eat that entire rye bread last night?”  
Bofur shrugged and nodded. “I was hungry.”

Thorin sighed. “I’ll take over your remaining watch. I need to think. Go back to sleep.”

Bofur hesitated. “Can I eat the remaining piece of bread? There is dirt on it, so I doubt anyone else would want to eat it anymore and I’m hungry.”

Thorin shook his head in disbelief. “You do realise that the entire reason you are in this situation is because you have been stealing food? So no, you may not keep the bread you tried to steal.”

Bofur nodded sadly and returned to his bedroll. Moments later, they heard his snores join those of the other dwarves. Thorin stared after him, still shaking his head. “Is there anything else I ought to know?”

Fíli shrugged helplessly. “He has had quite an appetite lately. Bifur and I have been giving him parts of our own rations. I just never thought he would resort to stealing... I don’t know... maybe I misjudged him...”

Thorin patted Fíli on the shoulder. “Even the best of us can have moral lapses. Don’t be too hard on him or yourself. Passing judgement about the thefts is my task, so do not torture yourself over it. And try to get some sleep.” 

Fíli nodded and turned to leave. 

“Oh and Fíli,” Thorin reached out a hand to stop him. “I’m proud of how you handled this. I know it was not an easy decision to tell me, but it was the right one. Sometimes duty to the group forces us to make choices we would not have made for ourselves. You will one day be a good king.”

Fíli thanked him and hurried off. He carried his bedroll from where Bofur was sleeping to the space next to Kíli, where he lay the remaining night, tossing and turning. Praise from Thorin had never felt so meaningless.


	10. Repercussions

Morning finally dawned grey between jagged leaves not even Bilbo had been able to name. Thorin still sat on the rock at the side of the clearing, pulling at his cold, empty pipe. He had taken over the last watch as well.

Fíli heard Kíli stretch, yawn and grunt beside him. Then Kíli opened his eyes and blinked sleepily at Fíli. “What are you doing here?”

Fíli shrugged unhappily.

“Oh.” Kíli said. “A fight with Bofur?”

“Something like that, yes.”

Kíli patted him on the shoulder. “I’m sure it will turn out alright.”

They silently ate the breakfast that was handed to them after Thorin had quietly exchanged words with Dori.

After they had packed their bedrolls, Thorin asked for their attention. “This night, it came to my awareness that Bofur has been taking more than his share of food.”

There was surprised muttering among the dwarves, only Bifur stood there motionlessly.

“Oh,” Kíli whispered and then turned to Fíli. “You caught him, didn’t you?”

Fíli nodded. 

Thorin cleared his throat and the dwarves fell silent again. “After much deliberation, I have decided that there is no use in deciding on a punishment before we are out of this forest. From now on, Bofur will adhere to the rations assigned to him and we will all make sure the supplies are not touched by anyone without Dori’s or my permission. Can we all live with this decision or are there other suggestions?”

There were muttered conversations and quite a bit of grumbling, but finally, the company nodded their assent. 

They started their journey, Kíli staying beside Fíli. Fíli was thankful for his silent support. He felt a bit guilty at the relief he felt that for once, Bofur wasn’t humming as he walked towards the back of the group.

It was towards afternoon that Kíli started a conversation with Ori and Fíli drifted more towards the front of the group. He soon found himself walking next to Bifur.

“You knew it was Bofur, didn’t you?” he asked quietly.

Bifur nodded.

“And you didn’t say anything?”

/Kin,/ Bifur signed.

Fíli swallowed. “I hope you understand that I couldn’t stay silent, as much as I love him.”

Bifur nodded. /Royalty has to have other loyalties. Just as long as you don’t forget about him./

“I won’t, of course not. What I also wanted to tell you: I think it’s admirable how you take care of Bombur,” Fíli said.

/He and Bofur did the same for me when I was injured. It is the least I can do for him. I am just glad Thorin didn’t leave us standing at the river./

Fíli shook his head. “Thorin wouldn’t do that and if he did, I wouldn’t stand for it. Your family is practically kin to me.”

/Thank you. It means much to me./ Bifur said. /I know we are being a burden to everyone, with Bombur needing to be carried and Bofur behaving this way. I worry about them./

“I do too, Bifur,” Fíli said, putting his hand on Bifur’s arm. “If there’s anything you need help with, tell me and I will do whatever I can.”

That evening, Fíli received his portion of food. He hesitated for a moment, and then went over to where Bifur and Bofur were sitting by Bombur’s side. Bofur looked up at Fíli hopefully as Bifur watched. Without a word, Fíli ladled some of his food onto Bofur’s plate, then turned around and went to sit next to Kíli. 

 

As it turned out, it was not at Bifur’s asking that Fíli came to the family’s aid. A few days later, Fíli overheard a snippet of conversation between Nori and Glóin.

“I wouldn’t trust him as far as I can throw him,” Nori was saying. “Something just isn’t right with that dwarf. I wouldn’t even put it past him to have damaged the boat on purpose so that he could have Bombur’s ration of food.”

Glóin nodded, not noticing that Fíli was heading towards them, rage written plainly across his face.

“Just look at how cheerful he is, whistling and singing even though his brother...”

Glóin was silenced by an elbow in the ribs from Nori, who had spotted Fíli.

“I will not stand for anyone talking about my fiancé like that,” Fíli said, barely refraining from shouting. He forced himself to keep his hands away from his swords. “In fact, I wouldn’t let anybody be accused that way without proper proof. How dare you spread such vile rumours, and that about someone you have shared countless jokes, trials and hours around the fire with? As far as I know, Bofur has been nothing but kind to you and this is how you repay him?! He made one mistake and immediately, you treat him like this. And that after we decided that your past is your past and that we would not look too closely at whatever crimes you may have committed!”

Fíli felt a hand on his shoulder and realised that he had broken his resolve and had been shouting for a while now, his nose inches from Nori’s. Most of the company was gathering round and the others were close by, carefully pretending not to listen. The hand on his shoulder was Kíli’s and it was joined on his other shoulder by Dwalin’s. 

Thorin strode up to the group. “What is going on here?” he demanded. 

“They were spreading unfounded accusations against Bofur,” Fíli said through clenched teeth.

“Is that true?” Thorin asked, turning towards Nori and Glóin. “Were you claiming things without having proof for them?”

“We were talking about Bofur, yes,” Glóin said. “And what we said could have been nicer.”

“I’m not sure if it was completely unfounded though,” Nori muttered.

Kíli and Dwalin had to tighten their hold on Fíli.

Thorin sighed. “If you have no proof for your accusations then tame your tongues. If you do have proof, then come directly to me. There is enough tension in the company that we don’t need nasty rumours spreading about. And all of you should know how to behave like civilised dwarves,” he looked at Fíli strictly. “I do not wish to spend this journey solving petty conflicts like a schoolteacher.”

 

That night was the first night Fíli put his bedroll next to Bofur’s again. 

“This doesn’t mean I think what you did was alright,” he told Bofur. “But I don’t want to cause any more ridiculous talk. And I do love you, you know.”

Bofur smiled. “I love you too.” He leaned over and kissed Fíli.

Fíli immediately deepened the kiss, acutely remembering just how long it had been since they had any privacy.

“Maybe when everyone except the watch is asleep...” Fíli whispered into Bofur’s ear.

Bofur shook his head.

“Don’t worry, we’ll be quiet and nobody will notice.”

“Sorry,” Bofur mumbled into Fíli’s neck, “I just don’t feel like it.”

Fíli nodded and kissed Bofur again. “Alright. It was a silly idea anyway.”

Bofur snuggled back into him as Fíli curled around him.


	11. Fun with Mushrooms

One week after he had fallen into the river, Bombur finally woke. The company was sitting together for a meagre breakfast when they heard Bombur give an especially loud snort. When they turned around, he was yawning and looking around in confusion.

“Where am I? Where did the food and the tables go? Where are the harps and the flutes?”

The company jumped up and ran over to Bombur.

“Bombur! You’re awake! How are you feeling?” Kíli asked.

“Hungry,” Bombur replied. 

Dori hastily cut off two slices of the maggoty bread they were eating. The quality of the food had deteriorated in the last few days. 

Bombur looked at it and wrinkled his nose. “What is this? What happened to the feast? There was roast pheasant, carrots, pork, potatoes, cakes, wine and whatever else you could wish for.”

Dori frowned. “This is all we have, and you already got an extra slice since you were asleep so long. Either you eat it or you give it back, we’ll be happy for the additional bread this evening. The maggots and weevils aren’t too bad either, even though you wouldn’t think so. They almost replace the meat. The little ones are tasteless and bland but not too bad. You have to bite the head off the bigger white ones first, or else you’ll get quite a stomach ache. Be careful about the black and red ones though. If you eat those, you’ll get blisters in your mouth and probably all down your digestive tract as well, going by past experience.” 

Bombur grimaced but started nibbling at the side of the slices anyway. He glanced at the trees distrustfully. “Why is the forest so dark anyway? There were lights and music. Elves too, but they weren’t even that bad.”

“You were asleep,” Balin supplied. “You fell into the river when the boat capsized while you were crossing the river. You were asleep for over two weeks now.” 

“Oh. What were we doing in a boat on the river anyway? Aren’t there enough bridges to cross the Brandywine?”

“The Brandywine?” Fíli asked, dumb-founded. “We’re in Mirkwood.”

Bombur paled. “Why are we in Mirkwood? What did I ever wake up for when I could have continued feasting with the elves?”

After exchanging perplexed glances, they decided to continue their journey and explain everything that had happened while travelling.

 

The path now led through forest that mainly consisted of oaks and beeches, with a few other trees mixed in, as Fíli found out from Bilbo. It was not quite as dark and gloomy as on the other side of the river, but it still felt suffocating. Mushrooms were back as well, sometimes glowing in the gloom, sometimes just growing on trees and by the side of the path. They often reached monstrous sizes.

“Look, this one smokes!” Kíli exclaimed, prodding one bulbous specimen with his boot. It emitted a yellow-greenish cloud. “I accidently stepped on it and it did this.”

Ori looked around. “Look, there’s another one!” He apprehensively touched it with a stick and it puffed out a purple cloud. “Hey, they have different colours! What colour does that one have?”

Soon, the entire company had joined in, starting bets on which colour a certain mushroom would emit and trying to kick as many as possible of a certain colour. Some tried to find patterns between the colours of the dust and the trees underneath which the mushrooms were growing.

Fíli saw it as a sign of how monotonous the forest had been that even Thorin, Dwalin, Óin, Balin and Dori joined in. For the first time in ages, the group laughed, sang and joked as they travelled. 

That evening, Dori brought out the last piece of cheese they had left and they told stories and sang songs until late into the night.

Fíli took over the first watch, contently humming the hobbit drinking song Bilbo had taught them all. Slowly, the others began drifting into sleep, their snores a familiar backdrop to Fíli’s humming. Not even the sinister calls of the owls seemed too disturbing that night.

All of a sudden, Thorin shot upright and drew his sword, looking around wildly. “The white stag! It was here again! Where did it go?”

“You must have dreamt it, Thorin,” Fíli tried to calm him down. “You were asleep and I didn’t see anything.”

“But... it was right there!” Thorin said, pointing at a bank beside the path. “Nothing about it was like a dream.”

“I can assure you, there was nothing there,” Fíli repeated. “I was facing that direction the entire time.”

He went over to the place Thorin had shown him, taking one of their emergency torches with him.

“Was it here?” he asked and Thorin nodded.

Fíli lit the torch and searched the ground. “There are no tracks here, stag or otherwise,” he said. 

Thorin seemed surprised, but lay back down again. Fíli resumed his watch, surprised at how shaken his uncle had seemed.

Fíli’s watch passed without any further incident. He woke Balin for his watch, crawled into his bedroll and fell asleep despite the screeching of the owls.


	12. The Feast

The company started into the next day slightly more subdued. Bilbo and several others seemed to have been impressed enough by Bombur’s description of the elvish feast to dream of it as well. They were all disappointed to be torn out of this fantasy and back into the bleak reality.

They set out grumbling and only ill-temperedly kicked at one of the mushrooms from time to time. The mushrooms, however, began to glow more strongly until they seemed like coloured lamps by the side of the path.

Fíli was just about to stop and marvel at them when Thorin’s cry startled him. “There! Kíli, get your bow! There was the white stag again!”

They stopped as one and Kíli took his bow out. He crept closer to the tree Thorin had indicated.

/There’s nothing here,/ he signed in Igleshmêk.

/Keep looking further into the forest. It has to be somewhere,/ Thorin signed back.

Kíli kept looking into the forest as far as he dared. Finally, he came back. “Sorry, I couldn’t find it.”

“We’ll get it next time,” Thorin said, grimly determined.

Fíli briefly wondered why he was so set on killing the white stag, but was quickly distracted by the pulsating lights of the mushrooms again. 

When Fíli paid attention to the path again, he noticed it was becoming narrow and was winding through the trees instead of mostly running straight ahead. They had started losing speed. Some of the others also seemed to be admiring the mushrooms or were peering into the forest.

Bilbo was gazing up into the darkness of the treetops. “Look! All those butterflies! There have to be thousands of them!” He said, pulling at Ori’s sleeve.

Ori squinted into the darkness and Fíli looked towards where Bilbo was pointing as well.

“I can’t see anything,” Ori said, “only darkness.”

“Well, they are very dark, nearly black,” Bilbo replied. “I wouldn’t expect anything else in this forest. But they are pretty.”

Ori stared up again and shrugged. Fíli couldn’t see anything either. A hobbit’s eyes really seemed to be much more efficient than a dwarf’s.

They continued on, Bilbo still marvelling at the butterflies. 

 

They hadn’t gone very far when Fíli heard Thorin growl behind him.

“Elves! I knew it! They are hiding behind the trees. Fíli, warn the others quietly, we might be attacked.”

Fíli did as he was told and the dwarves continued, ready to reach for their weapons at any moment.

“That’s typical,” Thorin grumbled. “They show up when you don’t expect them and then they disappear again!”

The dwarves were almost about to relax again when Thorin charged towards the trees.

“What to you want of me, King of the tree-shaggers?!” he yelled. “You traitor of traitors, at least have the courage to face me!”

He rushed around the trees. 

“Where are you? What elvish sorcery did you use to disappear now? Not only are you a traitor, you’re a coward as well! At least face me, you elvish heap of refuse!”

As the remaining company watched, Fíli followed his uncle between the trees.

“He’s gone,” he said quietly. “And if he’s not, you’re just making a spectacle of yourself, which is probably exactly what he wants. Beorn said we shouldn’t leave the path. We ought to return before we get lost.”

Thorin fell silent and followed Fíli back to the path, still fuming. They continued on their way, Thorin glaring at the forest more than ever.

 

They travelled for a while without anything happening before Ori halted abruptly in front of Fíli. “I hear music!”

The others stopped as well, looking around. 

“Look, there’s light in the forest!” Dwalin said, pointing.

“It’s the feast!” Bombur shouted and then there was no more holding the company. They scrabbled into the woods, tripping over twigs and branches. They slipped on dead leaves and mushrooms in their haste to get there. 

“Wait! Stay on the path! There are elves and there is no trusting elves!” Fíli heard Thorin yelling in the distance, but the prospect of a feast was stronger. Although Fíli had neither been able to hear the music nor see the light from the path, it soon became clear that there was really a feast going on. He could see the light of several fires and hear the harps and singing. The smell of roasting meat made Fíli’s stomach rumble.

They stumbled into the clearing. Darkness greeted them.

Groping blindly, Fíli found the arm of another dwarf. “Kíli?”

“No, I’m Bofur.”

“Why are you so thin?”

“I told you, I’m hungry. Where did the feast go? It was here just now.”

“I don’t know,” Fíli replied. “Where are the others? Kíli?”

Amidst the confused muttering, Fíli heard Kíli’s voice reply. “Fíli? I’m over here.”

Fíli’s eyes slowly adjusted to the darkness again and he reached for Bofur’s arm to pull him towards Kíli. To his surprise, he noticed a bruise forming on Bofur’s arm.

“Where did you get that bruise from?” Fíli asked as they made their way over to Kíli.

“I probably got hit by a twig when running,” Bofur said without looking at the bruise. “Don’t worry, it doesn’t hurt.”

“What happened to the feast and the elves?” Kíli asked when they reached him. “They were right here, the Elvenking with a crown of orange leaves on his head singing such a beautiful song...”

By now Fíli had fully regained his sight. The wistful look on Kíli’s face nearly turned his stomach.

“That’s just the kind of sorcery elves are fond of,” Thorin thundered and Fíli felt a sudden surge of relief that Thorin had followed them despite his misgivings. “Elves will enchant you with their singing, wine and sweet words and then it will all just turn out to be a mirage. That’s why you can’t trust them. Now we need to return to the path before we can’t find...”

“Look! There they are!” Glóin shouted, pointing. “We just stopped too quickly!”

“No, stay here! It’s not real!” Thorin shouted, but clearly Fíli’s uncle had to be mistaken. The feast was right there, waiting for them. Once they had finally satisfied their hunger and drank as much wine as they wished, they would be able to join the dancing and perhaps teach the elves some new songs. 

Fíli rushed towards the feast with all the others, not caring that he tore open his hand on a stump when tripping. Blood dripping from his hand, he raced into the brightly lit clearing, only to be enveloped by darkness again. Somebody ran into him, cursing as they both crashed to the ground.


	13. Grasping and Stumbling

Carefully detangling himself from the other dwarf, who turned out to be Ori, Fíli stood up, trying to comprehend what had just happened. He had been so sure the feast was in this clearing, with hundreds of dishes giving off the most savoury scents and brightly coloured lights hanging down from the trees. He could almost still hear the elves singing.

“They smiled at me and asked me to dance,” Kíli sighed beside him. “Where did they go? Why did they not take me along with them?”

Ori was patting the dirt and leaves from his clothes. “We’re going about it the wrong way. We can’t just rush into their feast like that. No wonder they keep running off.”

Kíli looked at him, falling out of his stupor and breaking into a grin. “That’s it! That’s pure genius! We have to sneak up on them! Perhaps some of them are like Thorin except that instead of not liking elves, they don’t like dwarves. Maybe they try to keep the other elves away from us and that’s just not fair. I want to sing and dance with the elves!”

Something about Thorin not liking elves rang a bell in Fíli. There was something his uncle had said about the elves....

“No!” Ori protested. “Sneaking up on them isn’t what I mean! That’s rude, even ruder than eating everything in Bilbo’s pantry. We can’t do that!”

Kíli scowled. “Are you trying to keep me away from them? I won’t let you do that! They smiled at me, so they want me to be there. I won’t be separated from them. You are just jealous that they asked me to dance and not you!”

Ori shook his head vigorously. “You can’t just assume that everybody likes you! People hate it when other people make decisions for them and just assume they’ll be fine with it. You have to be polite to them and ask if you can join them. Maybe they’ll let us to the feast then.”

“They did like me!” Kíli shouted at Ori, leaning over him. “And they did ask me to sing with them and dance. Me! Not you!”

Fíli expected Ori to back away from Kíli, but instead, he drew himself up to his full height and glared right back a Kíli. “They won’t like you if you treat them like that! Nobody likes a bully who sneaks up on other people’s feasts and demands that they do what you want them to. You can’t do that! You need to be polite and ask them, but I’ve never seen a dwarf be as rude as you are today! All you want to do is threaten them!”

“I am not rude!” Kíli shouted back. “They like me! And I am certainly not going to threaten them!”

Nori suddenly pulled Ori back and stepped in front of him. “Are you trying to threaten my little brother?” he asked Kíli in a dangerously quiet voice.

Instinctively, Fíli stepped in front of Kíli, but Kíli sidestepped him. “No, I’m not threatening anybody! Ori is just refusing to believe that the elves’ invitation for me to dance with them was real!”

“It’s not real!” Fíli exclaimed, finally remembering what had been just out of his grasp the entire time. “Thorin said none of it is real!” 

That was the exact moment when Thorin crashed into the clearing. “Where has it gone? Where did that Mahal-cursed elf and his mouldy stag go?”

The other dwarves stared at Thorin and there was a moment of silence, only broken by Bilbo muttering softly, “And where did the butterflies go? They were so very pretty...”

“Never mind your stupid butterflies,” Thorin growled at Bilbo. “That elf king and the white stag ran through here just a moment ago, so why is none of you chasing them? At least show me where they went. I am going to kill them!”

“It’s not real,” Fíli repeated uncertainly. “You said elves like mirages....”

“Of course they do!” Thorin said. “That’s why I need to get that elf and stop him! He can’t keep making you think there’s a feast. I won’t let him keep laughing in my face! He has made a fool of me often enough! I will stop him!”

“But what if it’s not just the feast that isn’t real? Maybe the elf you saw isn’t real either. We all saw that feast as clearly as we see that bush over there and the bat doing cartwheels in it, but there’s no feast, is there? Perhaps it is the same with the elf you... wait... bats don’t usually do that, do they?” Fíli stared at the animal in the bush at the side of the clearing, as did all the others. 

“Bats usually fly through the air, don’t they?” Bilbo asked. He creased his forehead in thought. “Bats fly and butterflies do too... so butterflies should fly through air as well, shouldn’t they?” Bilbo turned around in a circle and then brightened. “Air! I know! I need air! Then I’ll find the butterflies!” 

Bilbo rushed over to the nearest tree and started scampering up. 

“What are you doing?” Thorin asked him.

“Don’t worry! If I find your elf and the stag, I’ll let you know!” Bilbo called and disappeared into the leaves.

“We should probably stop him, shouldn’t we?” Kíli asked. 

The other dwarves nodded, but none of them did anything but stare up the tree after Bilbo. 

“He’ll be so sad when he misses the feast,” Bombur said mournfully.


	14. Elves

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just in case somebody needs the warning: this chapter contains a brief instance of misgendering.

“Look at those branches dancing around,” Bofur said. “Do you think they are real or not?” 

“Is that even a question?” Fíli replied. “But look at those mushrooms. They keep changing colour. I don’t think we’ve seen those before.”

Bofur shook his head. “No. But they’re pretty, even if they aren’t real.”

“Hmm, they are pretty. Just like you.” Fíli gazed at Bofur. “Hey look, there’s something crawling about under your face.” He giggled.

Bofur laughed as well.

“No, really. Right here.” Fíli reached out and touched the finger-long bump creeping through Bofur’s cheek. “It’s kind of awesome.”

“I found the butterflies!” Bilbo announced, letting himself drop to the ground from the lowest branch. “I didn’t find the stag and its elf though. Sorry, Thorin. But I thought I should tell you anyway, that’s why I didn’t stay with the butterflies, even though I wanted to.”

He brushed a hand across his face, pulling away some sticky strands. “I don’t know where all the cobwebs came from though. There were so many of them... There must have been spiders around to weave them. I don’t particularly like spiders.” He shuddered slightly.

“Do you think the butterflies were really there?” Fíli asked Bofur.

Bofur shrugged. “It probably would be the kind of thing Bilbo would hallucinate. And I never did see any butterflies.”

Fíli nodded. “It would. How long do you think we’ve been hallucinating? Was the stag at the river real? After all, Thorin keeps seeing it when it’s not there.”

“Maybe the glowing mushrooms and animals weren’t real either. I don’t really think something like that can exist.” Bofur creased his head in thought, the thing under his skin now slowly pulsating between his eyebrows. “Maybe even that wasp wasn’t real!”

Fíli’s eyes widened. “Do you think this forest even exists? Maybe the entire journey never happened and we’re still in the Blue Mountains, and just drank too much of Gadi’s special mushroom ale.”

Bofur shook his head. “Can’t be. Or he wouldn’t be here.” He nodded towards Bilbo, who was stumbling backwards across the clearing with wide eyes, his sword drawn.

Fíli blinked and then sat up straighter. “Wait, where did Bilbo go? He was just there!”

Bofur was also rubbing his eyes in confusion. “Do you think he disappeared because we realised he’s not real? I don’t think Bilbo will be happy to find out that he doesn’t exist...”

“Wait, I can still hear him... Can you as well?”

Bofur nodded. “Why is he singing though? And what’s an attercop?”

The memory of an old lesson surfaced in Fíli’s mind. “I think that’s an old word for spider.”

A small spider scuttled across Fíli’s hand towards the middle of the clearing. “Oh, he’s singing to the spiders. That’s kind of adorable.”

Suddenly, Bilbo appeared again, seemingly from thin air. He ran across the clearing in circles, waving his arms above his head while still holding his sword. “Here I am, come and get me! Unless you are too fat and lazy to catch even the slowest of hobbits.”

“He seems to be having fun,” Bofur remarked. “And he doesn’t seem too disturbed by the fact that he stopped existing for a while.”

“Hmhmm,” Fíli agreed, leaning back again. Above him, glittering lights appeared. “Look at those lights.”

Bofur tilted his head up as well. “Pretty, though I’m not quite sure if those are stars, more strange creatures or mushrooms. Doesn’t really matter, I guess.”

“They look a bit like the lanterns the Elvenking had at his feast.”

They looked up in silence for a while, ignoring Bilbo’s strange exclamations and the conversations of the others in favour of watching the lights above.

“I think I like these hallucinations,” Bofur finally said. “I just wish I’d be able to hallucinate having a full stomach.”

“That feast really would have been nice,” Fíli agreed. “Talking of which: there are elves again. They look a bit more like Thorin’s elves though, taking prisoners rather than feasting and dancing.”

Sure enough, a group of elves had entered the other side of the clearing carrying bows and swords. Bilbo seemed to have disappeared again. The elves quickly relieved Kíli and Ori of their weapons and tied their hands together as the two young dwarves rolled about giggling. Dori, Nori, Bifur and Bombur followed, Dori politely trying to engage them in conversation. The red-headed elf briefly replied while the fair-haired elf that seemed to be in command continued on to Dwalin, Glóin and Óin with the other elves. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” Dwalin asked, drawing himself to his full height in front of the elves when they tried to tie him up. Sadly, the effect was somewhat lessened by the fact that Glóin had braided all kinds of colourful mushrooms into Dwalin’s beard and remaining hair.

“You like mushrooms, don’t you?” the red-haired elf asked, turning away from Dori. Dwalin stared at her in confusion as she smiled at him. “Do you want to see a really interesting mushroom? It barely weighs anything.”

Dwalin stretched his hands out and the elf put a cloud-like mushroom into his hands before tying them up.

“It’s a nice mushroom, isn’t it?”

Dwalin nodded. “I’ve never seen one that looks like a feather before.”

“What is he talking about?” Bofur whispered to Fíli. “It looks like a normal mushroom.”

Fíli shook his head. “No, it looks like a cloud, not a feather or a normal mushroom!” 

They looked at each other for a moment.

“It’s not real, is it?” Fíli finally concluded. 

Bofur slowly nodded. “She only said there is a mushroom, but there isn’t one.”

They were quickly distracted from their epiphany when Thorin stormed up to the elves.

“Oh, I think Thorin is also hallucinating the elves. This is bound to be interesting,” Fíli said. 

“Do you want a mushroom as well?” The elf asked Thorin sweetly, bending down. “No need to get angry, there are enough mushrooms for all of you.”

“You can stick your mushrooms into the deepest of caverns!” Thorin roared. “You may be able to fool all of them, but not me! I know you elves well enough to see through your little tricks!”

“That’s a bit hypocritical, isn’t it?” Bofur whispered into Fíli’s ear. “Seeing as he is hallucinating them as well.”

“Okay, not a mushroom then. Perhaps a piece of bread?” The elf asked.

“I would not sell my freedom for a piece of bread, even if I were starving in the forest! I have more honour than that, though you traitorous elves are probably not capable of understanding things like honour!”

The fair-haired elf looked at Thorin and slowly recognition dawned. “You’re Prince Thorin. I thought you had died years ago. My father will be interested to hear about what you are doing here.”

Thorin glared. “You will release my company at once! You have no right to take us captive!”

“Do I not? You are trespassing in my father’s forest, with a group of armed dwarves no less. It is well in my right to ask you to come with us.”

Thorin roared in rage and Fíli realised that the red-haired elf had used Thorin’s preoccupation with the other elf to tie him up as well. 

“If he doesn’t want the bread, can I have it?” Bofur called. “I don’t care if it is only a hallucination like you are; perhaps eating hallucinated bread will be able to make me imagine having something in my stomach.”

“Of course, here you go,” the red-haired elf said, handing it over and tying up Bofur’s hands in almost the same motion. 

The other elf shook its head in disbelief. “What did you do with my father’s mushrooms? Roll in them? Other travellers are slightly incapacitated by them, but you are all completely out of it.”

Fíli struggled to his feet, not prepared to let this indignity sit on him.

“Now, young lady, I...”

“I’m not a lady! I’m a man!” The fair-haired elf protested.

“A man?” Bofur looked at him in confusion. “But I thought you were an elf! You have pointy ears, a bow, weird straight hair and live in a forest... You look like a tree-shagger to me.”

The elf took a closer look at Bofur, froze and took a step back.

“When did the wasp sting you?”


	15. Advice

There were frantic discussions in Elvish, complete with wild gestures in Bofur’s direction. Fíli didn’t think he had ever seen elves this perturbed. 

“What’s going on?” Bofur asked Fíli. “How did they know a wasp stung me?”

Fíli shrugged. “I don’t know, elves are sometimes strange like that. But I’m sure it will all be fine.” The knot in his stomach spoke a different language, but he didn’t want to upset Bofur, just in case it turned out to be nothing after all.

Bofur nodded and started humming quietly.

Finally, the red-haired elf came over, keeping a safe distance from where the dwarves huddled together.

“Was he the only one stung? And where did it happen?” she asked.

“I was also stung,” Fíli said, immediately feeling uncomfortable as the elves’ scrutiny turned to him. “He got stung when he tried to protect me from the wasp and chased it away from me so it couldn’t eat me. It was about five days of travel into the forest on the path from the west.”

“Did you get two stings or only one?” The elf asked.

“Only one. Why, is it important?”

“You really have no idea, do you? That wasp wasn’t trying to eat you; it wanted to lay its eggs in you. It sounds as though you might have been lucky, but your friend here wasn’t. The first sting is usually to paralyse you and then the wasp lays its eggs with the second sting.”

“Did you really not notice there was something wrong with him?” the fair-haired elf asked. “There’s a larva moving about in his face, for Valar’s sake!”

Thorin bristled and stepped forward even though his hands were still tied up and useless.

“Legolas, don’t mock them,” the red-haired elf said, quickly followed by some rapid Elvish. 

Fíli bit his lip. He glanced at Bofur, who was still humming quietly, prodding at some glowing mushrooms with a stick. Of course there had been signs that something had been wrong with Bofur. The constant hunger, the cheerfulness and detachedness when it wasn’t appropriate and the twitching muscles had all disturbed him at one point or the other, but he had never added it all together. After all, the forest had affected them all in one way or another. Fíli suddenly wished he were still hallucinating, but for some reason, everything had begun feeling terribly real the moment the first elf mentioned the wasp.

Legolas scowled but remained silent as the other elf turned towards the dwarves again.

“The larvae are going to continue growing until they hatch, probably killing him in the process. They might already be influencing his personality, making sure he does what is best for them. Your best bet is going to be cutting them out of him as soon as possible; it might not be too late yet. Is there a healer amongst you?”

Óin stepped forward. “I am a healer.”

The elf tossed him a small flask.

“This is a sedative. Give him five drops so he won’t feel anything, ten if he is to sleep.” She tossed a larger flask. “Put this on the wounds to prevent inflammation. Make sure you get all the larvae; there should be about six to fourteen. If you don’t...” she shrugged and shook her head. 

She looked at Fíli and Balin, the only ones who didn’t have their hands tied up. “You have knives, don’t you?” 

After a moment of hesitation, they nodded.

“Then I’ll leave it to you to free your companions. Anyway, I wish you the best of luck.” She turned around and went over to the other side of the clearing, where the other elves were waiting. They dumped the weapons they had taken from the dwarves on the ground and turned to leave.

“Wait!” Thorin bellowed. “You cannot leave us here like this! We will starve!”

Legolas turned around. “I am not staying out in the forest any longer than necessary if there might be death-curse wasps about. I will not risk the lives of my people because a horde of dwarves was too stupid to treat the sting of a death-curse wasp correctly. Really, how can you not know that you have to cut out the eggs as soon as possible? You are lucky Captain Tauriel here insisted on helping you. The safest course would have simply been to kill him and burn his corpse.”

“We will starve in the forest! Our food is nearly gone and we are lost! If you leave us here like this, we can only die or follow you. So unless you want us to come after you, you have to at least give us some food and show us the way back to the path!”

Legolas hesitated, clearly not wanting to lose any more time or be anywhere near the dwarves. “Alright, we leave our food here; we won’t be continuing this hunting expedition anyway. The forest path is in that direction, just follow the trail by the markings in the trees.”

The other elves unloaded the food they had in their packs in a rush, throwing it on a large heap on the forest floor. Fíli looked in the direction Legolas had pointed. There was indeed a barely visible trail and the faintest of marks carved into the trees. When he turned back towards the elves, he saw the last bit of a dark green cloak disappear into the forest. 

Fíli turned around to help Balin and Bilbo, who had reappeared, free the other dwarves. Fíli bent down to cut the ropes off Bofur’s wrists first, painfully aware of the larva now twitching down his jaw line. Bofur’s eyes were wide and his hands trembling.

“Did they say I have to be cut open?”


	16. Decisions

“I don’t want to be cut open,” Bofur said. 

“We should get back to the path as quickly as possible first,” Fíli said as he quickly freed Kíli and Ori from their bonds. “Then we can think about what to do. I don’t want the elf trail to disappear, you never know in this forest.”

He looked at Thorin pleadingly. Thorin hesitated and then nodded. “We find the path first.”

Bilbo helped Bofur up. “I’m sure it won’t be necessary, don’t worry.”

They all quickly picked up their weapons and the supplies the elves had left them. Then they hurried towards the trail Legolas had shown them, Dwalin and Kíli leading the way. Bilbo, Bifur and Bombur stayed close to Bofur, trying to calm him and cheer him up. Fíli noted that the others kept glancing at Bofur and that Nori made sure Dori and Ori kept their distance from him. 

Fíli wanted to hurry to Bofur’s side to comfort him as well, but a hand on his shoulder stopped him. 

“Wait,” Thorin said quietly and called Óin over with a motion of his head. Balin joined them as well. They followed a little bit behind the others. 

“What do you think about what the elves said?” Thorin asked Óin.

Óin sighed. “I know you don’t trust them and I don’t either, but there is something to their words. There is clearly something moving beneath his skin. I’d have to take a closer look, but we shouldn’t completely disregard what they said.”

“I don’t think they would just have let us go if what they were saying weren’t true,” Balin said. “They were clearly terrified.”

Thorin nodded slowly. “That’s what I thought.”

Fíli closed his eyes unhappily, only to trip over a root. He was only prevented from falling by Thorin catching him in time.

“He is terrified of a healer cutting him,” Fíli said. “He fell down a mine when he was little and had to be stitched back together. He has been afraid of such things ever since.”

Óin sighed. “I’m afraid we might not have much choice. But we’ll have to see.”

“Here’s the path!” Dwalin’s voice came from ahead. They all hastened their steps and soon enough, the trail met the path they had been travelling before they had run into the forest to join the elves’ feast. Fíli hadn’t thought he would ever be glad to see the dreary forest path, but he was.

“Alright everybody, we’ll take a moment to look through what supplies we have and pack them properly,” Thorin announced. 

Óin went over to Bofur. “May I take a look at the bump on your face? I won’t hurt you; I just want to see if it is something serious.”

Bofur hesitated. 

“Go on,” Bilbo urged him. “When I was young, I once fell on a pile of wood and my hand hurt so horribly I thought they would have to amputate it. I didn’t even dare to look at it. My mother took one single look at it and got some tweezers. Turned out there was only a splinter in it. Better get it over with and then be able to relax, because chances are it’s nothing bad.”

Bofur nodded. “Alright. Take a look at it then.”

Fíli smiled at Bilbo thankfully. Óin examined the bump, carefully prodding at it and watching as it squirmed.

“Do you have any more of these?” Óin asked.

Bofur hesitated and scratched his nose. “No, I don’t think so.”

Fíli had a sinking feeling in his stomach. Bofur had never been a good liar. Apparently, Óin caught it as well, since he squinted his eyes in scrutiny.

“Are you absolutely sure about that?”

Bofur nodded. “Of course I am. It’s harmless, right? So when do we go on travelling?”

Óin sighed. “I’m afraid it’s not that simple. There does seem to be something living under your skin and we should take it out. You won’t feel a thing thanks to the sedative the elves supplied us with...”

“No!” Bofur shouted and backed away, reaching for his mattock. “You can’t cut me open!” He looked at Fíli helplessly.

“Please, Bofur,” Fíli said, reaching out a hand to Bofur. “You heard what the elves said. It’s dangerous if you don’t let Óin take out the larvae. You might die.”

Bofur shook his head. “They are elves! Since when do you trust elves? And you might as well be hallucinating this... this... thing. Who said we ever stopped hallucinating?!”

“I’m pretty sure this is real, Bofur,” Fíli said. “Please, you won’t feel a thing.”

“Only because I’ll be dead!” Bofur said, running away from them. Fíli was prepared to go after him to make sure he didn’t get lost in the forest, but to his relief, Bofur only ran to the edge of the group. Fíli watched him pace up and down. 

“I’ll go,” Bilbo said and followed after him. 

Óin, Fíli and Thorin, who had joined them sometime during the discussion, looked at each other. 

“It’s like the elf said,” Óin finally said. “I don’t think Bofur is telling the truth when he says that is the only one. We have to take them out.”

“But we can’t force him to let you take the larvae out,” Fíli protested.

“You heard what the elf said about the larvae making him do what is best for them,” Óin said. “I think she may have been right. Bofur usually isn’t one to lie.”

“Maybe he isn’t lying,” Fíli said, looking at the floor. “And even if he is, telling one lie doesn’t have to mean he is behaving strangely and being changed by larvae.”

“Fíli,” Thorin said softly, “we talked about this even before we knew what was really going on. You said yourself that there have been situations lately in which you barely recognised him. I know you don’t want this to be true; I don’t either. But we have to face the reality.”

Fíli glanced around and noticed Bifur and Bombur hovering close by. He waved them over.

“You heard what we were saying, didn’t you?” 

They both nodded.

“You should probably have a say in this as well, as his kin,” Fíli said.

Thorin and Óin nodded in agreement. 

/Something has been going on with him,/ Bifur signed. /If it is the wasps, they need to be taken out, if there’s any safe way to do it./

Óin nodded. “It didn’t seem to be too deep under the skin, so it shouldn’t be too risky. Probably only a small cut for each one and some stitches, if the larvae aren’t too difficult to pull out. I have the elves’ other tincture and enough salves to make sure the cuts won’t get inflamed.”

Fíli shook his head. “I don’t feel comfortable making this decision against his will.”

/Bofur and Bombur had to make decisions for me when I was injured,/ Bifur signed. /I could only thrash and scream and I would have died if they had let me have my way. I think this is the best for him./

“The elf said Bofur would probably die if we don’t cut the larvae out,” Bombur said quietly. “We can’t let that happen.”

“And if we don’t cut the larvae out, but... I don’t know... just squish them?” Fíli asked. 

“If they were smaller, it would be worth a thought,” Óin said. “But I don’t think it’s possible with this size of larvae. We would only risk an inflammation.”

“It’s an uncomfortable decision, but it’s for the best, Fíli,” Thorin added. “I don’t like how nervous the elves were either. They are cowards, but they usually aren’t afraid without a reason. This isn’t only the best for Bofur, it is the best for the group as well. I don’t want to think about what will happen if we do nothing and the larvae hatch.”

Fíli gazed into the forest for a few moments before nodding. “Alright. If there really is no other way.”

“There’s one more thing,” Óin said. “I need to make sure you aren’t also affected, if that’s alright with you.”

Fíli nodded and took off his clothes, shivering in the cool autumn air. Óin carefully examined Fíli and finally nodded.

“You were lucky. No sign of any larvae.”

Fíli quickly dressed again and the company started travelling again, their spirits lower than ever. 

 

Early that evening, after Dori had handed out their share of elvish bread, Fíli took a water skin over to where Bofur was sitting.

“Look, I’m sorry about earlier.” Fíli swallowed against the lump in his throat. “I should have listened to you and accepted your decision. I thought I’d bring you a little peace offering. Water with a tiny bit of ale added. You don’t want to know what I had to offer Dori for it.”

Bofur smiled at Fíli and took the drink. “Thank you.” He drank some and then held the water skin out to Fíli. “Do you want some as well?”

Fíli shook his head. “I couldn’t go drinking my own peace offering to you.”

Bofur grinned. “I guess it’s all mine then. I had almost forgotten that this is what ale tastes like.”

They sat in silence as Bofur drained the water skin. Bofur crumpled a leaf in his hand and Fíli noticed with a shudder that there was a larva moving in his hand. He wondered how he could have missed this for so long.

Bofur yawned and leaned against Fíli. “Too bad we didn’t have that feast. The elven way bread is better than the maggot-ridden stuff we’ve had lately, but I could have done with a full stomach.” He yawned again. “It is so much nicer to fall asleep with a full stomach.”

He closed his eyes as Fíli wrapped his arms around him. 

Fíli thought Bofur had fallen asleep when Bofur suddenly sat upright again, struggling to keep his eyes open. 

“Why am I so tired? None of you is falling asleep yet. You... you put that elvish poison in my drink, didn’t you?!”

Bofur struggled to his feet, only to lose his balance and nearly topple over, his hat falling to the ground. Fíli caught him as his knees gave way.

“You poisoned me! How could you do that to me?” he grappled at Fíli’s hands as Fíli guided him to the ground as gently as possible. 

“I’m sorry, love. There is no other way. Don’t worry, it will all be alright.” Fíli stroked Bofur’s hair, trying to calm him down.

“Don’t let them kill me,” Bofur whispered, grasping at Fíli’s hand. “Please don’t let me die.”

Fíli took Bofur’s hand in his and kissed it, trying not to flinch back from the larva pulsating under the skin. 

“I won’t,” Fíli said, blinking back his tears. “Don’t worry, I won’t. I promise.”

Bofur was already asleep.


	17. Knives and Tweezers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If descriptions of medical procedures bother you, you might want to skip this chapter. There is also mention of vomiting, just in case there are any emetophobes on board.

“Thank you, Fíli,” Thorin said, placing his hand on Fíli’s shoulder. 

Fíli shrugged it off. “Let’s just get this done with.”

Fíli, Bifur and Dwalin carried Bofur to the fire they had lit, a little bit away from the group for some more privacy, as Óin, Thorin and Bombur followed. They set Bofur down gently. 

“There’s one in his hand,” Fíli said.

“We need to see if there really are others and where they are,” Óin replied. 

Bifur, Bombur and Fíli undressed Bofur. Fíli shivered when he saw how thin Bofur had become. His constant hunger suddenly made a lot more sense. In some places, bruises were visible where the larva had burrowed through Bofur’s flesh.

“Here’s another one,” Bombur said, pointing at a bump on Bofur’s upper arm. Fíli suspected it had been the one they had seen in his face that morning.

They soon found another on Bofur’s left leg and a series of bumps on his stomach.

Óin looked closely at each of them. “They all don’t seem to be too deep under the skin, but I can’t quite tell with the ones in his stomach. I think I’ll start with the one on the upper arm.”

“May I watch?” 

Fíli looked up to see that Ori had come over, his book in his hand.

“I’d like to document this for the chronicle of our journey.”

The others looked around at each other, and then nodded.

“Alright, but don’t get into the way,” Óin said. 

Bifur excused himself to go over to the others. /I can only look at blood when in battle frenzy or I get ill,/ he explained. 

Dwalin turned around to watch the forest, lest they were attacked when vulnerable.

Fíli held the hand of the arm Óin wouldn’t operate on and watched as Óin wiped the skin over the larva was with the elvish fluid. Then Óin took one of the knives he had heated over the fire beforehand and then let cool down.

He made a slightly curved cut beside the larva. Fíli watched as the thin line turned red, some blood trickling down. Bombur wiped it away.  
Then Óin took his tweezers and tried to grasp the larva. He shook his head.

“The cut is not wide enough yet.”

He widened the cut and reached for the tweezers again. This time he managed to get a hold of the animal and inched it out of the incision as it struggled and twitched.

“There we go!” Óin said triumphantly.

Fíli watched in fascination as the larva emerged from the wound, as long and thick as his fingers and so pale it was almost translucent. The larva was covered in a sheen of blood, pooling more thickly between the segments. It squirmed frantically as it tried to escape the tweezers. Fíli felt his stomach twist unpleasantly. 

Behind him, Dwalin retched violently and rushed behind a tree to noisily expel the contents of his stomach.

Óin plopped the larva into a bowl where it struggled uselessly in its new environment.

Fíli took a deep, steadying breath and looked at the others. Bombur was slightly pale but determined as he dabbed the blood away from the wound carefully and applied the elvish fluid against inflammation. Thorin, on the other hand, had turned a delicate shade of green.

Óin also glanced up as he took the needle to stitch the wound shut. He sighed. “Please just leave, Thorin.”

Thorin gave him a tight-lipped nod and hurried off.

Óin shook his head. “I will never understand how little battle-hardened warriors can stand when it comes to healing.” 

He gave Fíli a stern look. “Are you alright there, lad? You can leave too if you like, but send someone else over to give me a hand if you do.”

Fíli shook his head. “I’m fine.”

“Good. Then you can put an end to this piece of vermin,” Óin nodded towards the bowl with the squirming larva and began stitching.

Fíli braced himself, but he was spared by Ori.

“May I draw it first?” Ori asked eagerly. “I’ll make sure it doesn’t get away and I can kill it afterwards.”

Óin nodded. “Just make sure you don’t touch it while it is still alive, just to be safe. And hold the bowl over here when I tell you to so that I can put in the next one.”

Ori nodded and took the bowl. He prodded at the larva with a stick and started sketching it without any of the disgust Fíli felt.

Fíli gently stroked Bofur’s hand and then cleaned the used knife and tweezers, heated them over the fire and set them down on the clean piece of cloth Óin was keeping his tools on.

Óin had moved on to the larva Fíli had seen in Bofur’s hand earlier, which had now moved into his lower arm. This time, Óin knew how large the cut had to be and the larva was extracted more quickly. Again, Fíli cleaned the tools while Bombur cleaned the wound and Óin put in the stitches.

When Óin was working on the larva in Bofur’s leg, Fíli glanced over at Ori. Ori had killed one of the larvae when he had finished drawing it and had now slit it open, looking at its insides with curiosity. Fíli had to swallow hard and look away when he realised the pink ribbon running through the larva were its guts, filled with pieces of Bofur’s flesh. 

Finally, Óin moved on to the larvae in Bofur’s stomach. He extracted the first one without any difficulties, even though he had been worried they might be more difficult to get.

The second larva in Bofur’s stomach was a different story. It managed to squirm from the grasp of Óin’s tweezers and Óin had to widen the cut to get a hold of it again. He was about to stitch up the incision when he paused and squinted.

“I think there may be another one in there, but I’m not sure.”

Fíli looked at the wound, the red of the bleeding skin giving way to something yellowish. Suddenly, something squirmed and a part of a pale larva became visible.

“There! It really is another one!” 

Óin saw it too and managed to grasp it before it squirmed back to somewhere they couldn’t see it. He pulled it out and dropped it into the bowl. He hesitated and peered at the cut critically.

“Those were all we could see. I’m just worried we couldn’t see that last one from the outside. What if there are more?”

Fíli glanced at the bowl with the larvae. “We have six here. The elf said there should be between six and fourteen, so maybe we got them all.”

“Maybe,” Óin said, frowning. “I just wish we could be sure. But I don’t want to go looking for more that aren’t visible from the outside. I might damage something.”

Bofur stirred slightly and Fíli grasped his hand a bit tighter. “Don’t worry, everything is fine. Just keep sleeping.”

“Close him up,” Bombur said nervously. “We don’t know how long exactly the sleeping draught works.

Fíli nodded. “You should. I don’t even want to imagine Bofur waking up now.”

Óin complied and quickly stitched up the wound. 

“We just need to keep an eye on him.”


	18. Distrust

It was early in the morning and grey light was filtering through the trees when Bofur opened his eyes. Fíli had spent the night next to him, sometimes dozing off from exhaustion, sometimes lying awake watching Bofur and worrying.

“How are you feeling?” Fíli asked Bofur quietly.

Bofur blinked at him as if he were trying to figure out what Fíli was talking about. Then he glanced down at his arm, saw the bandage and realisation dawned on him. He flinched away from Fíli’s hand.

“Stay away from me!”

“Bofur, please. I’m sorry, but it was necessary. You’ll probably feel better now that the larvae are out, once the wounds are healed. Do they hurt much?”

Bofur shook his head. “No, they don’t hurt at all. But that’s not what this is about. You betrayed my trust! You let them cut me open!”

“I’m sorry, Bofur. Can you please forgive me? I only wanted what was best for you.”

“The last time you apologised to me, you poisoned me! How am I supposed to forgive you?! Just leave me alone!”

Fíli swallowed. “I really am sorry. Are you sure you are alright? Do you want me to get you anything?”

“I’m fine, see?” Bofur prodded at the wound on his arm with a force that made Fíli wince. “It doesn’t hurt. Just go away and leave me alone!”

Fíli nodded miserably. “Alright. But let me know if you need anything.” 

He gathered up his bedroll and set it next to Kíli’s. 

Kíli stirred and sat up. “Is everything alright? How’s Bofur?”

“He’s awake and says he’s alright; that his wounds don’t even hurt. He wants me to stay away from him though, because of what I did.” Fíli buried his face in his hands.

“Oh.” Kíli pulled Fíli into a hug. “You did the right thing and I’m sure he’ll forgive you once the shock has worn off.”

 

Bofur made sure to stay away from Fíli while they were travelling that day. Their rations were slightly larger because of the food the elves had given them and when Fíli wanted to give Bofur some of his food, Bofur turned away wordlessly without accepting any.

Fíli watched Bofur to see if he really wasn’t in pain and to his surprise, Bofur continued to show no signs of pain. Heeding Óin’s advice, they stopped more often in order to give Bofur a bit more rest. Even when they travelled, the forest crept by slower than ever before.

Bofur also refused to let Óin check his wounds. When Óin wanted to change the bandages, Bofur insisted on doing it himself. Óin grudgingly agreed after telling Bofur what to pay attention to. 

“I really should take a look at those wounds to see if they are healing properly,” Óin complained to Fíli. “This goes against everything I was taught as a healer.”

Fíli nodded unhappily. “I know. I would be happier if you could take a look at the wounds as well. I should be happy he isn’t in any pain, but with wounds like this, it worries me that he isn’t feeling any pain at all.”

Óin nodded. “Me too. Could you maybe talk him into letting me take a look?”

Fíli shrugged hopelessly. “He won’t listen or talk to me. If anything, he trusts me even less than you because I was the one to betray him.”

“I still have some of the elves’ sleeping drought. Maybe...”

Fíli shook his head. “No, he wouldn’t fall for that again. I won’t do it again either. Betraying his trust once was too often already.”

Óin shrugged. “If you say so. I just hope it doesn’t get inflamed.”

Fíli looked over to Bofur, who was watching them suspiciously.

 

The next couple of days continued in the same way. They continued travelling and Bofur only spoke to Bombur, Bifur and Bilbo. Óin had tried to get them to convince Bofur to have his wounds looked at, but he refused. Óin repeatedly tried to talk with him as well, but he wasn’t successful either.  
Fíli himself had given up trying to convince Bofur of anything and was reduced to asking Bofur to give him another chance. He was always met with cold silence.

They made frequent halts and soon, Bofur was asking for halts himself. 

During one of these breaks, Kíli came over to Fíli.

“I don’t want to worry you, but is it possible Bofur is asking for breaks more and more often?”

Fíli swallowed. “I was hoping I was imagining it.”

“It might be nothing,” Kíli said, but he didn’t sound convinced.

 

After that, Fíli found himself watching Bofur even more intensely than before. He saw each time Bofur stumbled, how he dragged his feet along. Fíli kept close to him and when he tripped over a root or his own feet, caught him.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m fine, no thanks to you. Now let go of me.”

Fíli did as he was told and went back to watching.

 

Before long, Bofur spoke up. “Could I have another break?”

“Alright,” Thorin agreed, “we take a short break.”

There was some grumbling in the group as the stopped beneath the ever-present oaks and beeches. “We just took a break, why does he need another one already?”

“We’ll never reach the edge of the forest at this rate!”

Fíli glared at everyone who was complaining.

 

Some time later, Thorin got up. “Alright, we should have gotten enough rest by now. Let’s go. The faster we travel, the sooner we leave this awful forest behind us.”

“But we only just stopped,” Bofur protested. “Can’t we stay a bit longer?”

“We need to leave now if we are to get some more travelling done before it gets dark,” Thorin said.

“I’m too tired to go on,” Bofur said. 

Thorin sighed. “Alright. It is almost late enough to make camp for the night, so we’ll spend the night here. Go to sleep early, because we’ll start earlier than usual tomorrow to make up for the time we lose today.”

Worried that his exhaustion might be caused by his wounds being inflamed, Bifur, Bombur and Bilbo tried again to convince Bofur to let Óin examine him. Again, Bofur refused. 

 

The next morning, they rose early. Dori quickly handed out breakfast and they packed up their things.

The first of the company were getting ready to leave when Fíli noticed that Bofur was still sitting under the same smooth-barked tree as he had the previous evening, showing no sign of getting up.

“Want a hand up?” He asked, trying for cheerful.

Bofur shook his head. “I’m still too tired. I’m not coming.”

“What are you talking about? Of course you are. Up you get.” Fíli reached for Bofur’s hand but Bofur flinched away.

“No. I’ll follow when I’m a bit less tired.”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Bofur!” Fíli replied, his voice rising.

“What’s wrong?” Thorin asked and Fíli noticed the others were gathering around, some concerned, others curious and some annoyed.

Bofur looked at Fíli but Fíli looked away from him in a sudden fit of defiance. If Bofur wanted to be this way, he could at least explain it himself.

“I’m still too tired to go on,” Bofur said.

“What do you mean, too tired to go on?” Dwalin asked. “You had a good night’s sleep, did you not?”

Bofur shrugged. “I did, but I’m still exhausted. I doubt my legs would hold me if I tried.”

The members of the company glanced at each other helplessly. 

“You carried me, didn’t you?” Bombur asked. “Surely we could carry him; it wouldn’t be too much of a task in comparison.”

“No!” Bofur said, backing up against the tree. “I don’t want anybody touching me!”

There was quite a bit of discussion, but in the end, they decided to wait until Bofur felt better, mostly because nobody came up with any idea of what else to do. Bofur still refused to let Óin look at his wounds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To everyone checking in on this story or who has just read to this point, I just wanted to say I haven't abandoned it. I know I said I'd have it all posted by now, but I was a bit unhappy with the ending and decided to change and expand it. I don't have much more to write (I hope; this story keeps surprising me), but real life caught up with me (you have no idea how much I'd prefer writing the last last chapter to writing that job application...). I hope I'll have it written and betaed by the end of next week though. Sorry about the delay!


	19. Dissent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really sorry for the long wait! I know I said I'd have it all posted by now, but I was a bit unhappy with the ending and decided to change and expand it. Then real life caught up with me and you know how that is....

The company sat around waiting. Some spent the time catching up on sleep; others took care of their weapons. A few members of the company were restless, pacing up and down, grumbling and glaring at Bofur or into the forest.

Occasionally, somebody asked Bofur if he felt up to travelling again. The answer remained the same.

When Bofur still refused to get up on the second morning, the grumbling in the group grew louder. 

“How long will we have to wait?” Glóin complained. “We have been in this forest for far too long already and I finally want to get out. We can’t just interrupt our journey merely because one of us is too lazy to continue travelling.”

“In case you hadn’t noticed, he was ill and Óin had to cut him open in several places,” Fíli snapped at him. “Being ill and injured is hardly the same as being lazy!”

“Well, his feet weren’t injured, were they? Surely he should be able to walk.”

Fíli glared at him but before he could reply, Óin jumped in. “Just because his feet weren’t affected doesn’t mean he has to be well enough to travel. That’s not how bodies work.”

Glóin shrugged and scowled at his brother. “I still think he should be able to continue the journey.” He strode off to the other side of the camp.

 

The restlessness of the company continued to grow over the following days. In the end, it was Nori who lost patience late one morning.

“Look, I know you want to coddle him, but it isn’t safe to stay here. We need to leave this forest and he either needs to let himself be treated or we have to leave him behind.”

“How dare you even suggest that?!” Fíli replied. “He just needs a bit more rest and then he’ll be fine and will continue the journey with us!”

“Will he?” Nori asked. “You saw how terrified the elves were of him and of what he is carrying inside.”

“That’s why Óin took out the larvae. Bofur just needs to heal.”

“Can you be sure Óin really managed to get all of the larvae?” Nori retorted. “Can you guarantee that he didn’t miss one or two or twenty? Bofur will neither let us check his wounds nor see that there aren’t more of those parasites crawling about under his skin. So what happens if those things hatch? The elves ran off for a reason, I recon.” 

“You want to see my wounds?” Bofur asked. “Fine. Here you are.” He hitched up his sleeve to show the cuts on his arm. The cuts were still visible, but they were clearly closing up and healing. Bofur showed the cut on his leg as well. “Happy now?”

“I’ll be happy if you get up and we can continue. So can we leave now?” Nori said.

Bofur shook his head. 

“And for that matter, you only proved that a couple of your cuts are healing. There were more, if I am not mistaken, and if you don’t let yourself be examined properly, we can’t be sure you don’t have more larvae inside you.”

“I’ve proven all I need to prove! You can’t force me to do more than that!”

“Can we not?” Nori asked, taking a step towards Bofur.

Bofur reached for his mattock.

“Stop this immediately!” Thorin demanded. “This has gone far enough and I won’t stand for one member of the company raising arms against another.”

“Well, then you finally need to make a decision. Will you inconvenience one of us or risk all of our lives?” Nori asked.

Thorin looked back and forth between Nori, Bofur, Fíli and Balin. “Alright. I will decide before noon if you give me some time to think.”

Nori nodded and the group dispersed somewhat, the dwarves standing around in groups of twos and threes discussing things quietly.

Thorin went over to Bofur, nodding at Fíli to join him.

“Are you sure you aren’t able to travel?” Thorin asked him.

Bofur nodded, watching them suspiciously. 

“Then you’ll need to let Óin examine you or at least let us carry you. We can’t stay here.”

“I’m not letting anyone touch me!”

Thorin frowned. “How are we supposed to get out of this forest then? Because we really do need to continue our journey.”

Bofur shrugged and looked at the ground. “I suppose you’ll have to leave me here then.”

“Bofur, please, let us help you,” Fíli said, taking Bofur’s hand in his. 

Bofur flinched away, grasping his mattock more tightly in his other hand. “Don’t touch me! I never said any of you could touch me! Now leave me alone!”

Fíli wanted to reply, but Thorin led him away. “Don’t. There’s no use.”

He led Fíli far enough away from the group that they could talk without the others being able to listen.

“Fíli, I know this is difficult, but Nori does have a point. We need to move on. The forest is dangerous enough as it is, without staying in the same place for days on end. Not to mention that Bofur’s behaviour worries me.”

“You would behave strangely too if you had been through all that he has lately! We cut him open after I betrayed him and being cut open is what he is absolutely terrified of. No wonder he doesn’t trust us!”

“Be that as it may, we can’t stay here forever. Come up with a way to transport him that he will agree to and I will be more than happy to have it done, but as it is, we have to consider other options.”

“You can’t just leave him here! When Bombur fell into the river and wouldn’t wake, you said we wouldn’t just leave a member of the company behind, no matter how inconvenient it was to us. You can’t just go back on your word!”

“I know, Fíli, and I don’t want to. But we were able to carry Bombur, which Bofur won’t let us do. We cannot sit here until we starve or something from the forest kills us, you have to accept that.”

“I would already be dead if it weren’t for Bofur, or at the very least, I would be sitting there in his place! He saved me from that wasp. I won’t leave him, not now and not ever. I betrayed him once and I won’t do it again. It is your decision if you want to leave or stay here, but I will not leave him!”

With that, Fíli stormed off, standing by Bofur’s side to protect him if need be.


	20. Priorities

A while later, Thorin called Fíli, Kíli and Balin over. Grudgingly, Fíli complied. He noticed that the shape of Thorin’s pipe was now showing in the other pocket of his coat.

“Since Fíli won’t abandon Bofur and Bofur is not willing to leave, I have decided to split the group. Kíli, I need you to lead the group out of the forest...”

“Aren’t you going?” Kíli asked.

Thorin shook his head. “I’m staying here. I’ve put my people above my family often enough now. This time, I’m staying. But I need you to go on and lead the others, at least for now.” 

“So you want me to leave my brother behind instead, to go running like a coward?” 

“This isn’t about cowardice, it is about responsibility. And there might be a live dragon ahead and running towards a dragon is the opposite of cowardly. I won’t leave Fíli here on his own with Bofur and I don’t want the quest to fail, so I need you to continue it. We will follow as soon as we find a way to get Bofur to travel, so we will probably reunite in Lake-Town. In case we don’t make it on time, you must continue on to Erebor in time to be at the keyhole on Durin’s Day. Balin will be there to guide and advise you.” Thorin looked to Balin for confirmation.

Balin nodded. “Of course I will, though I would be more at ease if we all left the forest.”

“That does not seem to be an option right now,” Thorin said.

Kíli shook his head. “I can’t leave both you and Fíli behind like this! I’ll happily wait until we find a way to solve this.”

“Please, Kíli,” Fíli joined in. “We’d both be calmer knowing you are continuing the quest. You know how much it means to Thorin and while I feel guilty for keeping him here, I’d feel better knowing the quest will continue, no matter what happens.”

“Then why can’t I stay and Thorin continue?” Kíli asked. “I’m your brother; I ought to stay at your side!”

“This is not just about the quest,” Thorin said. “Like Nori says, there is the slightest possibility that we might be attacked while sitting by the side of the path day after day, and while we will probably be able to figure out a way to follow soon, I would rather know you out of the forest before that. Both as a guarantee for your safety and to be sure at least part of the company will be at the keyhole on time.”

“I still don’t like it,” Kíli said.

“Neither do I,” Thorin replied. “But this is the best way forward. Please promise you will attempt to reach the keyhole on time?”

Kíli hesitated. Finally, he nodded slowly. “Alright. I promise. But only if you promise you will try to rejoin us as quickly as possible.”

Thorin hugged Kíli. “Thank you, Kíli. I promise we will follow as soon as we find a way.”

He released Kíli and pulled out the map. He handed it to Kíli and then solemnly set the key to Erebor around Kíli’s neck. He gently touched his head to Kíli’s.

“May it not be too heavy a burden,” Thorin said quietly. 

Fíli swallowed against the sudden lump in his throat.

 

Thorin called the remaining group together. “Alright everyone, I have made my decision. Kíli will lead everyone who is willing to continue on the quest on to Lake-Town and Erebor. I will lead the remaining group to join them as soon as possible. In the meantime, each of you needs to decide whether to wait here with Bofur, Fíli and me or to continue on the original quest with Kíli and Balin.”

There were some whispered conversations amongst the others. 

“I’m going on to Erebor,” Glóin announced. “Though I wish the best of luck to those who stay here.” He nodded at Thorin, Fíli and Bofur. 

“We stay,” Bombur said, and Bifur nodded ferverently. “It never was a question for us.”

“So do I,” Dwalin announced.

“Are you sure?” Thorin asked. “I would breathe easier knowing you are at Kíli’s side.”

Dwalin shook his head. “You are my king, crown or no. I will not leave you.”

Thorin nodded. “Thank you, my friend.”

“My brothers and I are leaving,” Nori said. “We wish you luck, but we did not join this quest to sit around in a forest.”

There was a small sound of protest and when Fíli turned his head, he saw Ori opening and closing his mouth where he stood next to Kíli and Bilbo.

“I don’t know. It does not feel right to leave them behind. And I am fully capable of making my own decisions; I am no longer the little dwarfling you both still treat me as!”  
“Now look here, Ori,” Dori said. “I’m sorry we may not always have treated you the way we should have, but this is not the time to...”

Ori’s face turned red. “Don’t you dare to...”

Kíli’s hand on his shoulder cut him short. “I was hoping you would join my part of the company. After all, you are the scribe and there will be more to record on the journey to Lake-Town than there will be here. You’ve already drawn every plant and creature you could find here.”

Ori hesitated. 

“We really would like to be able to read the records of what happened until we rejoin you,” Fíli added. “There is no shame in going on. You are not abandoning us; you are merely going ahead until we follow you.”

“I really would be glad if you joined my company,” Kíli added.

“Alright,” Ori said after a moment. He turned towards his brothers. “And you both need to stop treating me as if I were a helpless dwarfling.”

Dori and Nori nodded. “If you feel so strongly about that, we will do our best.”

“I request that you leave as well, Bilbo,” Thorin said. “You are our burglar and will be needed at Erebor, so you should go with Kíli in case we are held up.”

Bilbo glanced at Kíli who smiled at him. “No key or map will do us much good if we don’t have our burglar with us. I’m sure Gandalf would agree as well.”

Bilbo nodded. “Alright. I long to breathe fresh air and see sunlight again, even though I do not like this business of dividing the company. Take good care of Bofur, will you?”

They nodded and Óin spoke up. “I intend to. My place is here with the sick. I’m staying.”

“Well then, that is all settled,” Thorin said.

 

As the others divided up their supplies, Fíli pulled Thorin aside. 

“You expect something will happen to prevent us from going on, don’t you?” Fíli asked quietly.

Thorin looked around, shifted on his feet and then nodded slightly. “I can’t rule it out.”

Fíli swallowed. “Please go on with the others. I don’t want you to put yourself into danger because I am too stubborn to leave Bofur. I know you have always wanted to reclaim Erebor and I don’t want you to fail because of me.”

Thorin smiled. “Perhaps it just isn’t for me to achieve it. Lately, looking at you and Bofur, I think I may have had some of my priorities wrong. I should have spent more time with you and Kíli instead of only caring for my people. You need me more than Erebor does now and I intend not to make that mistake again.”

“You never neglected us, if that is what you are trying to say. It is alright if you leave, I really wouldn’t want to put you into danger and have you give up your dream for me. And Kíli... do you think it is right to put this on his shoulders?”

“He is still young, but he is capable. I gave him the same training I gave you, although I was less hard on him since I thought the chances he would need it were lower. Kíli may sometimes be a little too rash but his charm will make up for it. He has Balin at his side for advice and to prevent him from making unwise decisions, though I’m sure he won’t need that for long. He also has loyal friends and strong warriors in the others. Kíli’s name may not be widely known yet, but that will change when he reclaims Erebor. Dwarves from all over will follow him.”

Fíli nodded. “I would still prefer if you went along with him.”

Thorin shook his head. “I am staying with you. And perhaps all my worry is for nothing and Bofur will recover soon so we can follow after the others. After all, as Kíli likes to say, I am a grumpy old man who always expects the worst.” 

Thorin’s smile didn’t quite reach his eyes.


	21. Brothers

It was not long before all the supplies had been divided. Most of their food was to stay in the forest since they did not know when the remaining group would be able to leave. Kíli’s company would travel with light luggage in the assumption that the forest would not go on for much longer. They would also take most of what remained of the company’s funds to buy supplies and perhaps smooth the going when they got to Lake-Town. 

Once his conversation with Thorin was over, Fíli had helped the others sort the supplies with meticulous detail. Even so, the farewell could not be postponed this way for long.

“Well, I guess there’s nothing for it,” Glóin announced, looking down at the neatly stacked packs. “I suppose we should leave as soon as possible to make the most of the day.” 

He brushed some dust off his hands and glanced at Óin, with whom he had been working side by side despite their differences during the last couple of days.

“Come here, little brother,” Óin said and stepped towards him, cracking their heads together. “Do try to keep your temper in check and don’t set anything on fire either.”

“I was little more than a dwarfling when that happened,” Glóin grumbled, clinging to Óin. “You will never let me live that down, will you?”

“Of course I won’t,” Óin replied. “That’s what older brothers are there for.”

Fíli swallowed and had to look away. As much as he stood by his decision to stay with Bofur, the guilt of tearing the company apart bubbled in his stomach.   
He glanced over at Bofur who was accepting Bilbo’s goodbyes. Fíli tried to summon surprise that Bofur didn’t seem to care much, but he had to admit to himself that at this point, a heart-felt reaction from Bofur would have been more astonishing. 

Again, Fíli averted his gaze. A few steps away from the company, Balin and Dwalin had been in quiet conversation for quite some time, occasionally falling silent and pressing their foreheads together in kin-comfort. 

Not far from them stood Kíli and Thorin. Thorin was imparting some last-minute advice on Kíli. Fíli realised that Kíli had been standing differently since Thorin made him promise to try to reach the Hidden Door. His cheerful bounciness had vanished and instead, his head was held as high as possible, as though to refuse to let the weight that was dragging at his shoulders pull him under water entirely. It was the stance Thorin had had for as long as Fíli could remember, he recognised, and the similarity between Kíli and Thorin had never been as pronounced as it was now.

“Fíli?” a small voice interrupted Fíli’s thoughts and he looked down to see Bilbo, whose eyes were brimming with tears. “I just wanted to say... take good care of Bofur. I hate going on without him. He was always a good friend to me even when everyone else still thought I was just a burden to the company. I mean, I’m sure he will be alright, but just... take good care of him until then.”

He hugged Fíli tight and then laughed, the sound almost a sob. “I’m sorry. I should be comforting you and not the other way round. Like I said, I’m sure he will be alright.”

“Thank you, Bilbo. I will take care of him as best I can. And you take care of yourself.”

Bilbo nodded and then made his way over to where Thorin had just released Kíli from a long hug. 

Kíli met Fíli’s eyes and came over to him.

Wordlessly, he pulled Fíli into a hug.

“I’m sorry,” Fíli muttered against his ear after a long moment. “I didn’t want to tear the company apart.”

“It’s not your fault. You’re doing the right thing, staying loyal to Bofur. And I’m sorry for leaving you here. I wish I could have stayed with you.”

“No, don’t be. It is better this way. I just never even imagined being separated from you...” Fíli’s voice broke and he had to close his eyes to stop the tears from falling.

“Don’t!” Kíli said, a slight note of panic creeping into his voice. “Please don’t start crying or I will too. It will only be until Lake-Town or the Hidden Door, then you’ll join us again. It won’t be that long.” For a moment, he lowered his head and nearly whispered. “I’m scared. This isn’t what I should be doing. It’s Thorin’s place to lead the company, or yours. I’m the spare; I’m supposed to be supporting you, defending you and lightening your mood when necessary. I’ve never been as good as you at all the other things.”

“That’s nonsense!” Fíli protested, pulling back from the hug to grasp Kíli’s shoulders. “And you ought to know that. You know everything I do and Thorin just mentioned earlier that he is certain you will be great at being a leader. If you’re unsure, you can always look towards the other members of the company; they will do anything to support you. Because that is another thing about you, you know. You inspire loyalty and make people want to do their best for you. I don’t think Ori and Bilbo would have agreed to leave so readily if you hadn’t asked them to.”

Kíli looked up and studied his face. “Thank you. But please follow us as soon as you can.”

Fíli nodded. “We will.” 

He brought their heads together and for a few long moments, they stood in silence.

When they pulled apart, some of the others were already shouldering their packs.

“One last thing,” Fíli said as Kíli started to move towards them. “Don’t turn into Thorin. You know, smile sometimes.”

Kíli burst into laughter and just like that, he looked a little less like a dwarf who was denying he was drowning.

 

They said their remaining goodbyes and everyone embraced their kin one last time. Then they were off. Kíli led the way and Ori and Bilbo quickly fell into step beside him, wiping away their tears. Balin was right behind him. Dori and Nori followed and Glóin brought up the rear. 

The remaining company stood on the path and watched until long after the winding path had carried them away and they had disappeared into the gloom of the woods. 

“I suppose there is no use in standing here,” Dwalin said finally. “We might as well do something useful.”

He sat down at the side of the road and took out one of his axes to sharpen it, regardless of the fact that he had already spent most of the previous days doing so. 

Thorin turned away as well, careful not to let the others see his face. As Fíli sat down next to Bofur and started sharpening his own swords, he saw Thorin jerkily draw his sleeve across his eyes and then take out his empty pipe.


	22. Loyalty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry again for the long wait...

The next few days were spent in a haze of worry and boredom. Now that half the company had left and was no longer talking and grumbling, every rustling in the trees or undergrowth seemed magnified.

Fíli was too worried about Bofur to care about distractions. Bofur had mellowed a bit towards Fíli after Fíli had ensured he could stay, but he still wouldn’t let him or anyone else very close to him.  
Still, Fíli was glad that Bofur at least allowed short conversations with him without snapping at him. 

For a while, Fíli allowed himself hope that things were getting better. Then, he noticed that Bofur’s replies were getting shorter and shorter. He seemed to doze off more often as well, but the one time Óin tried to take advantage of this to examine him, Bofur snapped awake immediately, ready to defend himself.

One morning, about a week after they stopped their journey, Fíli woke suddenly, aware that something had startled him out of his sleep. He quickly looked around the company, but they all still seemed to be asleep. Óin, who was on watch, was nowhere to be seen.

Then, before he could wonder about this, he heard a strange sound coming from Bofur.

“Bofur? Is everything alright?” 

Bofur merely shifted in his sleep and Fíli decided it must have been nothing important after all. He settled back into his bedroll, appreciating the warmth it offered against the chill of the autumn morning.

Bofur gave a low groan. Fíli clambered out of his bedroll and rushed over to him. He gently touched Bofur’s cheek.

“Bofur, what’s wrong?”

Bofur looked at Fíli with those green eyes Fíli could always have spent hours looking at. Bofur opened his mouth, but before he could say anything, something moved under his clothes. Since Bofur wasn’t objecting to Fíli’s presence for the first time in days, Fíli leaned over to get a better look.

A wasp launched itself at his face. It was black, enormous and even more terrifying than he had remembered. Fíli tumbled backwards instinctively, scrabbling on the ground to get away. 

The wasp, however, didn’t seem to be interested in him and silently flew into the dark canopy above them, where it disappeared. Several other wasps followed immediately.

“Wasps!” Fíli finally found his voice again. “There are wasps!” 

He reached for his swords, but he had left them by his bedroll. The others woke, jumped up drawing their weapons and rushed over. Óin emerged from the bushes, pulling up his trousers as fast as he could. Dwalin tossed Fíli one of his spare knives as he ran. Fíli caught it and hurled himself towards Bofur again. He slashed viciously at the wasp that had just launched itself into the air, but he missed and it escaped into the foliage above as well. 

They stood around Bofur for a moment, waiting for more wasps to appear while Bombur kept a look-out for the wasps that had already flown away. After a few moments, Thorin nodded at Dwalin and spoke up.

“Try to get any wasps that emerge.”

Dwalin stepped forward and quickly slit open Bofur’s clothes. He immediately stabbed the wasp that appeared.

With a sick jolt in his stomach, Fíli realised that the wasp had been emerging through a hole in Bofur’s skin. There were several other holes scattered across Bofur’s skin, blood trickling down in a thin line. Bofur was nothing more than skin and bones, a stark contrast to less than two weeks ago when Óin had operated on him. Fíli supposed that Bofur’s clothes had done a good job in concealing his state and since Bofur had refused to be touched, nobody had realised just how thin he had become.

Bofur groaned again and Óin rushed forward while Fíli stood rooted to the ground in horror. Dwalin hurried off when Óin reached Bofur’s side, eager to get away from the wounds now that there was nothing more that needed to be fought. 

Óin examined the wounds.

“I think they have all hatched. How are you feeling, Bofur?” 

Bofur didn’t reply but his eyes met Fíli’s and Fíli finally remembered how to move. He rushed to Bofur’s side and clasped Bofur’s hands in his. Fíli realised Bofur’s breath was coming in rasping gasps.

“Please help him,” Fíli asked Óin.

“The wounds are deep and he isn’t in good shape. I think the wasps might have injured his lungs when hatching,” Óin replied, gesturing to the wound just below Bofur’s ribs. “I don’t know how much I can do.” 

“Are you sure?” Fíli asked around the lump in his throat.

“I could try to...” Óin trailed off as Bofur shook his head.

“You want me to do nothing?” Óin asked him.

Bofur nodded. He turned to Fíli.

“Stay.” His voice rasped and was barely audible.

“Of course. Of course I will. I would never leave you,” Fíli said, his voice threatening to break.

Fíli sat down with his back to the tree as Thorin, Dwalin and Óin stepped aside to give them some privacy.  
Fíli carefully shifted Bofur so that he could lean back against Fíli’s chest. Trying not to agitate Bofur’s wounds, he wrapped his arms around him, and took Bofur’s hands in his again. Bofur slightly squeezed Fíli’s hands and Fíli smiled down at him.

“Are you comfortable?” he whispered, trying to keep his voice steady.

Bofur nodded, his eyes locked on Fíli.

Fíli did not know how long they sat like that before Bofur’s eyes became unfocussed and glassy. 

“Bofur?” he asked quietly, but he already knew there would be no response. 

Fíli reached down to close Bofur’s eyes, tenderly stroking his face. 

Bifur began screaming loudly in Khuzdûl and rushed about their camp like a caged animal. Bombur gave a muffled sob and ran off to be alone, his hands raised to his face to conceal his tears.

Fíli cradled Bofur in his arms, tears streaming down his face.

“Fíli?” Thorin asked softly, standing over him.

Not looking at his uncle, Fíli shook his head. “Leave me alone.”

Thorin must have conceded, because Fíli heard his footsteps retreat.

 

Fíli did not know how long he sat there cradling Bofur’s body. 

After a while, Thorin came over again.

“I know you want time to say goodbye to Bofur properly, but we don’t know where the wasps went. It isn’t safe here, so we shouldn’t wait too long before resuming our journey. We have prepared the funeral pyre, so whenever you are ready...”

Fíli shook his head and Thorin left again. Fíli was vaguely aware of a muffled argument between Thorin, Dwalin and Óin, but nobody bothered him again.

 

Fíli’s throat hurt from crying and he was just about to fall into an exhausted sleep when he heard a soft rustling behind him. Before he could react, he felt a familiar sharp pain in his neck. On the other side of the clearing, he could see Óin being stung as well and sag where he was standing. 

Fíli tried to call out as he felt the wasp take off again, but his muscles wouldn’t obey him, just like he had already suspected. It didn’t take long for the others to notice the wasps had returned though. Dwalin turned to say something to Óin just as the wasp that had stung Óin launched itself into the air again. 

“Mahal no! They’re back!” 

Bifur charged towards the wasp, screaming in fury. Fíli had seen him in battle before and thought him terrifying then, but that had been no comparison to now when he wanted to avenge his cousin. 

The wasp tried to swerve out of his reach, but it was too slow. Bifur swept it out of the air with his boar spear and then skewered it. 

By then, the wasp that had stung Fíli and at least three others were whirring above what remained of the company.

“Stand with your backs together!” Dwalin bellowed but Bifur didn’t seem to hear him in his rage. He ran after two more wasps that were buzzing over his head at a dizzying speed. Bombur dashed after him and tried to pull him towards the safety of the group, but couldn’t get close without risking injury.

“Fíli, to us!” Thorin shouted. He had temporarily made one of the wasps retreat and looked over at Fíli. 

He froze for a brief moment as realisation dawned. Then he ran towards Fíli.

“Fíli!” Thorin yelled, paying no heed to battle formations or the wasps circling around him. Two of the wasps immediately took up pursuit.

“Thorin, no!” Dwalin shouted, dashing after Thorin, but Thorin had always been a faster runner than Dwalin.

Alerted by Thorin’s shouts, Bombur turned around. Seeing what was happening, he sprinted towards Fíli as well.  
“Here, come and get me, you stupid wasps! Have some juicy fat dwarf!” He shouted, tears streaming down his face as he waved his spoon above his head. 

Behind him, Fíli saw all tension leave Bifur’s body just as he killed one of the two wasps he was fighting. He collapsed on the ground with a look of surprise on his face, only barely missing his spear. The wasp on his neck took to the air again. 

Not realising Bifur had been stung, Bombur managed to strike one of the two wasps following Thorin out of the air with his spoon and jumped on it, flattening it with a sickening crunch. 

The other wasp got Thorin just before he reached Fíli. Fíli watched helplessly as his uncle crashed to the ground in front of him. Fíli had thought he would not be able to feel any more pain than he did on losing Bofur, but now, he felt the last bit of hope slip away. 

“Thorin!” Dwalin screamed, reaching him just a moment to late. He swung his axes, but the wasp had already taken to the air again.

“Come and get me, you awful monsters!” Bombur screamed, waving his hands. “I’m the one you want to have for dinner!”

The wasp that had stung Thorin swerved towards Bombur. Dwalin followed in hot pursuit. He did not see the wasp that had stung Bifur fly after him.

Against better knowledge, Fíli tried to call out, but of course, it was in vain. The wasp jabbed Dwalin’s neck and he fell, hitting the ground. Fíli could hear the air being knocked out of his lungs.

Bombur watched him fall, his mouth wide open in horror. He glanced over his shoulder and saw Bifur’s motionless body. Bombur stood rooted to the ground for a moment, quivering. Then he ran.

Bombur didn’t get far. One of the wasps flying after him swooped down onto his neck and delivered the sting in one smooth motion. Bombur crashed down, his speed still propelling him forwards to the side of the road.

The wasp settled on Bombur’s back, briefly cleaned itself with its forelegs and then sunk its stinger between Bombur’s shoulder blades. The second wasp did the same with Dwalin. Then it flew over to Thorin. As it began laying its eggs, the first wasp flew towards Fíli, no longer bothering to hurry or approach from where he wouldn’t be able to see it. 

Its eyes seemed even larger as it approached and Fíli saw the huge mandibles. He remembered that they had chewed their way out of Bofur and shuddered inwardly. It landed on his head and cleaned itself some more, covering most of Fíli’s sight. Its claws clung to Fíli’s face unpleasantly, just short of breaking the skin. Finally, it crawled over the top of his head onto the tree trunk Fíli was leaning against. Pushing and pulling at Fíli with surprising strength, it shifted him so that it could reach the space between Fíli’s shoulder blades. 

Fíli felt it pierce his skin and pump up and down, injecting its eggs.

A great calmness engulfed Fíli as he finally sank into the darkness.


	23. The Return (Epilogue)

The temperatures took a sharp dip before Kíli’s company reached Lake-Town and stayed low after that. The cold was another reason Kíli delayed the company’s departure from Lake-Town as long as possible, but Thorin did not come and in the end, Kíli kept his promise and left just in time to reach the keyhole of the Hidden Door by Durin’s Day. 

Things gained speed from there and Kíli felt they were barely able to breathe between entering Erebor for the first time, the destruction of Lake-Town and the men of Lake-Town showing up at Erebor with an army of elves. Not a day passed without Kíli looking towards Mirkwood hoping that Thorin and Fíli would show up with the remaining company.

Instead, Dáin received the message Kíli sent him with one of the ravens and came to Erebor with five hundred warriors and half that number of craftsmen.  
“This amount of treasure was bound to draw scavengers,” Dáin explained, “perhaps even worse than elves and men.”

As thankful as Kíli was to have Dáin’s people as support, their arrival threw back the negotiations with the men of Lake-Town, and this was not the first time there had been difficulties. Bard called the arrival of heavily armed dwarves a betrayal of hard-earned trust and days passed before the men and elves realised that the dwarves of Erebor still would not choose battle over negotiation. 

Despite this, Kíli slept easier now that the mountain was protected. The sound of hammers rang through the no longer quite so empty halls as Erebor was slowly made fit for habitation again. Kíli quickly came to value Dáin’s advice nearly as much as Balin’s. 

Finally, an agreement was reached that Erebor was to pay a large sum as compensation for waking Smaug and the resulting destruction of Lake-Town. The dwarves would also help rebuild the two towns and help house the men until then.

An agreement with the elves was harder to reach. Their claim to compensations was based on accusations that were often centuries old or on things that Kíli had always thought were common decency, like the right to travel on roads. For Kíli, most of the claims sounded like excuses to cheat their way into getting a share of the treasure. His blood boiled at the thought of paying for their miserable voyage through Mirkwood in gold. To add to his displeasure, none of the elves could give him any word on his uncle or brother, claiming they had used a different route out of the forest.

In the end, Kíli swallowed his pride for a chance to start a better relationship between the two realms. Erebor would pay a sum that made Kíli grind his teeth for the rights to travel through Mirkwood as long as the two realms existed. In return, the elves pledged to keep the path in a state that permitted safe travel on it every year from spring till autumn and to provide protection for any dwarf travelling on it when that wasn’t possible. In addition to that, Kíli would publicly apologise for the crimes his ancestors might have committed against the elves. 

The apology took place during the festivities to celebrate the treaties. There was a feast in the large hall of Erebor, not as bountiful as it would have been if their food supplies had been larger, but a feast nonetheless. Kíli delivered his apology, half expecting Thorin to barge in through the doors of the hall commanding the elves to take back their atrocious demands. Kíli cringed at the thought of explaining the sum he was paying to men and especially elves, but it all came from Kíli’s fourteenth of the treasure and whatever the others had decided to pitch in. Instead, it was Roäc the raven who flew in through the doors to warn them about two large armies of orcs and wargs marching on Erebor. 

The battle that followed was one Kíli would never forget. He carried a wound on his leg from the battlefield that would leave him limping for the rest of his life and left behind his right eye and half an ear. 

Recuperation tore at his patience. Thorin and Fíli still had not returned and being confined to his chambers left Kíli more than enough time to worry about everything that might have happened to them. He itched to return to Mirkwood to look for them.

Most of his companions were either injured themselves or busy rebuilding Erebor so they were only able to keep him company for brief stretches of time. Instead, Bard often sent his children to keep Kíli company so that they could learn about the dwarves’ culture. Bain and Sigrid often had other tasks to help with, so they only came occasionally, but Tilda was a regular guest. 

“People are starting to call you King Kíli Mithril-Eye,” she mentioned one day.

“I’m not a king,” Kíli protested.

“Why not? You rule Erebor like my Da rules Dale and he is a king now.”

“My uncle will be king once he reaches Erebor,” Kíli explained. “And my brother Fíli is next in line.” He told her why they hadn’t come to the mountain with Kíli, trying to keep the story simple enough not to scare her, even though the mere thought of some of the things that had happened sent shivers down his spine. 

“I hope they reach the mountain soon,” Tilda said, patting his hand when he had finished. 

 

When the healer from the Iron Hills proclaimed Kíli well enough to travel, Kíli had already had everything necessary for the journey prepared. He informed Glóin, Ori, Bilbo and Gandalf as well as the dozen warriors and another of the healers from the Iron Hills who would be travelling with them that they would leave the following morning. 

Daín would rule in Kíli’s stead while he was gone, since Balin had still not recovered from his heavy injuries. He tried to convince Kíli to at least wait until the spell of icy weather they were experiencing had passed, but Kíli had waited long enough. Gandalf agreed with him, stating they were less likely to encounter any more wasps when it was cold.

 

Snow crunched beneath their feet when they left the following morning, glittering in the sunlight like millions of tiny diamonds. Where the river emerged from Erebor, huge icicles had formed on the rock and pieces of ice floated down the river like giant, white water lily leaves. The dwarves’ breaths formed white clouds and within minutes, ice crystals were forming in their beards and the furs of their coats. Even Bilbo had agreed to wear boots.

The weather stayed clear and cold during their entire journey to Mirkwood. As glad as Kíli was to be on the road to find the part of the company that had remained behind, his trepidation grew as they came closer to the dark wall of trees on the horizon. 

The branches of the trees jutted into the sky like enormous skeletal hands. Kíli tried not to shudder as they stepped into their shadow. The same discomfort also showed on his companions’ faces and the ponies pulling the wagon with their supplies snorted uneasily as well. 

Despite the lack of leaves, the forest was no less gloomy than when Kíli had left it. The trees wore thick coats of ice on their trunks, dyed brown or green from the slime that covered their bark. What little light hit them reflected off them strangely, making the forest glisten like an otherworldly hall of mirror columns. In place of the constant rustling that had made Kíli uneasy when he had first travelled through Mirkwood, the forest was now silent, save for the occasional crackling of ice when it expanded or shrank. 

Water had gathered on the path in some places and frozen over to form dangerously slippery patches that were sometimes so wide the company could not always walk around. Instead, they formed lines and inched across the puddles, trying to prevent each other from falling. Occasionally, they toppled over one after the other, gathering a colourful collection of bruises. Other times, the ice was not thick enough to carry their weight and they broke through, soaking their boots and risking twisting their ankles and cutting themselves on the jagged edges of the ice. Luckily, their ponies were surefooted mountain ponies and none of them was injured.

On the third day in Mirkwood, it began snowing again. The tiny crystals soon made way for great clumpy snowflakes clinging to their eyelashes and clothes. Whenever one drifted into Kíli’s remaining eye, he was temporarily blinded until he managed to blink the cold, watery mass away.

The ground was soon covered by a thick blanket of snow, concealing the treacherous patches of ice. After a few dangerous falls, the company soon began prodding at the ground ahead of them with make-shift canes. While this mostly kept them from slipping on unexpected ice, it slowed their pace considerably.

They were all exhausted when they made their camp that evening. To their relief, the snow abated slightly.

Kíli woke to a heavy weight on him. Everything around him was white. Kíli struggled to sit up and realised he had nearly been snowed over. His companions had fared no differently and he quickly helped them free themselves from the snow. 

As they started walking, Kíli realised how many creatures had left their tracks close to them in the snow, just out of eyesight of the dwarf who had been on watch. Kíli couldn’t even recognise what kind of animals they had been, so strange were the tracks they left behind. 

It had stopped snowing by now. Where the boughs and twigs formed especially dense thatches, there was a thick layer of snow in the trees. In some places, the path was almost like a dimly-lit tunnel. 

That afternoon, Kíli suddenly heard a loud crack and a white mass came crashing down in front of him. When the dust had settled enough that he could see again, he saw Ori struggling and sputtering, trying to free himself from an avalanche that had been caused by branches collapsing under the weight of the snow. 

Kíli and the others quickly helped him. Luckily, Ori had not been badly injured. He only had a gash on his forehead where a small branch had struck him. They quickly cleaned the wound and when they were convinced Ori was really alright, continued on their journey. 

Like on his last journey through Mirkwood, Kíli quickly lost all sense of distance. The path wound its way through the forest in seemingly random curves and they still frequently had to navigate through patches of ice and around branches and trees that had broken under the burden of the snow. 

Kíli had counted the days on the way out of the forest, but since they were going so slowly, he had no idea how much further they would have to travel to reach the place where they had left the others.

 

Kíli was walking near the front of the company when he heard Glóin fall and curse.

“Damn branches, lying hidden under snow just to make us trip!”

Glóin picked himself of the ground, brushing more snow off what had made him stumble in the process.

Ori froze. “That’s... that’s not a branch.”

Kíli had come close enough to see as well and drew a sharp breath. Glóin was turning around slowly to look at the clearly dwarf-shaped lump.

“Clear the snow off him, quick!” Kíli instructed and Glóin and Ori sprang into action while the dwarves from the Iron Hills watched the forest uneasily.

It was Dwalin. 

Snow clung to his beard and crystals of ice covered his skin, which was stretched tautly over his bones. Kíli had never seen him so haggard. Kíli knew Dwalin was dead before the healer examined him.

A wave of despair washed over Kíli and he wanted nothing more than to sink to the ground to grieve. There was no way Thorin and Fíli would just leave Dwalin lying on the path if they had any choice.

"Look for the others," Kíli commanded, but they didn't have to look far.

They had already passed Bombur, whom they had mistaken for a log by the side of the road. Oín and Bifur lay on one side of the small clearing Kíli now recognised from when Bofur hadn't wanted to continue their journey. On the other side of the clearing, Fíli leaned against a tree trunk, holding Bofur. Thorin lay on the path close to them. 

Like Dwalin, they were skin and bones and frozen stiff. Kíli looked away from them.

"Keep a lookout," Kíli told the warriors from the Iron Hills. "Especially watch for any wasps hiding between the branches of the trees."

"No, no, it can't be!" Gloín was sobbing over Óin's body. Bilbo and Ori looked between their former companions helplessly, tears streaming down their faces.

Kíli took a deep breath and straightened. "How did they die?" He asked the healer, who was examining the bodies.

"All of them have large injuries from which the parasites, wasps as you say, must have emerged. Before that, the larvae seem to have consumed almost everything they could: muscles, fat, inner organs."

Kíli nodded. They were barely recognisable as emaciated as they were. 

"That one seems to have been dead a bit longer than the others," the healer continued, gesturing at Bofur. "Decay has already set in slightly while the others are completely preserved by the frost. He also has fewer wounds from the larvae."

Again Kíli nodded. "Oín removed several of the larvae from Bofur. We thought he had gotten all of them..." He trailed off, looking at the bodies of his kin and friends. "Why did they stay here and not do anything? Bofur was still able to travel for a few weeks after he was stung. Why didn't they cut the larvae out?"

The healer shrugged. "There are parasites that can adapt to their hosts, infecting different kinds of animals in different ways. Perhaps the wasps adjusted and made sure they couldn't move. From what you told me, it is also possible the wasp that stung Bofur was simply forced to flee before it could completely immobilise him. I am sorry for your loss, I wish there was something we could..."

Kíli shook his head. "Is it safe to take them back to Erebor or do we have to build them a funeral pyre here to make sure nobody else is harmed by the wasps?"

He looked at the wood already stacked into a pyre. Bofur must have died while the others were still able to move. Fíli must have been devastated. For a moment, Kíli was almost overwhelmed by the urge to comfort his brother, before he remembered he too was dead. 

"I am fairly sure all the wasps hatched weeks ago. There is no danger in taking their bodies back to Erebor to give them a proper funeral," the healer said.

Gandalf, who had come over without Kíli noticing, nodded. "The wasps are gone and it is more than unlikely that they will return at these temperatures. You can take as long as you like."

"We load them onto the wagon and leave as soon as possible," Kíli decided, realising the others were looking to him for directions.

The dwarves from the Iron Hills formed a circle, still keeping an eye on the forest. When Kíli walked over to Thorin’s body, Ori and Gloín quickly came to help him. Together, they moved Thorin's and the others’ bodies onto the wagon but Kíli barely saw what they were doing. 

When they were done, Kíli carved a rune into the tree at which Thorin and Fíli had died so that a stone to commemorate them could be raised in the future. Then the dwarves turned around and started the journey back to Erebor.

 

Kíli was not sure for how long they had walked when Bilbo’s voice pulled him from his daze. 

“Are you alright, Kíli? If there is anything I can do….” 

“I am fine. Thank you for returning to Erebor with us to pay your respects at the funeral instead of continuing your journey. They would have appreciated it.” Kíli distantly realised how impersonal he sounded.

“It is the least I can do,” Bilbo replied and they lapsed into silence again.

 

Kíli only noticed it was getting dark when one of the warriors from the Iron Hills approached him.

“Where shall we make camp for the night, King Kíli?”

Kíli almost replied automatically replied that he wasn’t king before it all hit him with full force.

“This spot looks as good as any, doesn’t it?” Ori said when he noticed Kíli’s blank stare and inablility to reply.

Kíli nodded and sprang back into action, mindlessly going through the motions of setting up camp. He was vaguely aware of Ori and Bilbo watching him with concern. Kíli ate the piece of bread he was handed without tasting anything, then watched as everybody went to sleep. Gloín’s back shook soundlessly as he fell asleep. 

 

When snores began to drift through the air, Kíli climbed onto the wagon and looked at Thorin and Fíli. After a while, he became aware of Ori’s presence at his side.

“He knew, didn’t he?” Kíli finally said. “They both knew. Thorin gave me the key and the map because he knew he wouldn’t follow us. And Fíli... he was trying to make sure I would get through all this alright. I didn’t even realise....”

“I think most of us didn’t. Nori probably did, but I think most of us others thought they would wait until Bofur got better or... died and then they would rejoin us. How should we have known this would happen?”

A few snowflakes started drifting down. 

“I didn’t think I would have to do this forever. I assumed I was just keeping things going until they took over again. I should have seen this coming, should have been prepared, but this is all so much...”

“You have achieved so much already. Everything is running so smoothly that you can surely take some time to grieve. Don’t forget we are in this with you and will help you in any way we can. You don’t have to be a king around us, you know.”

Ori pulled Kíli into his arms. For a moment, Kíli tensed even more. Then he sagged into the hug. He began to cry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for sticking with this story through the countless delays! One of the reasons for the delays was that I originally had a different ending planned. If you are interested in reading that, you can find it [here](http://octopus-fool.livejournal.com/25244.html).  
> If not, enjoy the factsheet in the next "chapter". :D
> 
> Again, thank you for reading this "short little fic" that was never meant to become longer than 5k words... XD


	24. The Beginner's Guide to the Animals of Mirkwood

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt like this was the perfect opportunity to transcribe something longer into Tengwar (although it's probably far from perfect) and maybe there are one or two other geeks out there who'll have fun trying to decipher it. XD
> 
> For all others, the regular version is below, so just scroll down. :D

[](http://imgur.com/wSP4NVW)

**Rachgûr Ercorhofal (Nastaráma qalme)**  
**Taken from “The Beginner’s Guide to the Animals of Mirkwood”**  
**Written by Tawartecil**  
**Funded by Aran Thranduil Oropherion**

**Other Names:** Death-curse Wasp or Death-curse Stingwing in the Common Tongue  
**Size:** about a cubit (18 inches/45.7 cm)  
**Distribution:** Sightings of the Rachgûr Ercorhofal have been reported from most areas of Mirkwood. It is likely that it spread north together with the growing shadow.  
**Distinguishing Features:** You will have no difficulties distinguishing the Rachgûr Ercorhofal from other animals. If you see one, you will know it. You should run if you are still able to. Report any sightings to the authorities of the Kingdom of Mirkwood immediately, especially if any stings occurred.  
Due to the dangers of studying this wasp, there have been almost no attempts to describe and sketch the typical wing markings as has been done for other wasp species.

**Life-cycle:** This curse of Morgoth is known for laying its eggs in every creature which is large enough. The main hosts are boar and deer, but the wasps have also enthusiastically used elves and men as hosts.  
The wasp generally attacks from behind, paralyzing the victim with a sting to the neck. It then lays between six and fourteen eggs into the skin between the shoulder blades.  
The eggs generally hatch after one or two days. The larvae move about under the skin, where their movements may be perceived as twitches. At first, the larvae feed on the fatty tissues. During this period, the host’s appetite increases, often driving the host to abandon caution in search of food. After the fatty tissues are consumed, the wasps may move on to other organs. As they grow, the larvae influence the host to avoid actions that may harm them, often changing the host’s personality significantly.  
Most growth occurs in the few days before pupating. The larvae will grow from about a palm (3 inches/ 7.6 cm) to three or four times that size. Unlike other parasitoid wasps, the Rachgûr Ercorhofal pupates inside the host’s body, making sure the host is still able to defend it. After only a few days in the pupa, the adult wasp hatches and emerges from its host, usually killing the host in the process.  
It has been observed that male wasps gather close to the victim when the wasps are pupated and will mate with the emerging females. If the female lays the eggs soon after hatching, it might inject enough venom to ensure the host is paralysed for the entire growth period of the larvae. This enables it to infect larger groups of victims without giving them the opportunity to excise the eggs. Occasionally, it has been observed that wasps from the same clutch cooperate by immobilizing a group of hosts first before laying their eggs. 

**Historical Facts:** Most information about the death-curse wasp is known thanks to the research of Lavandil, who managed to capture a live specimen and kept it and its offspring in an aviary with deer as hosts.  
After a tragic accident which Lavandil tried to conceal, the elven Kingdom of Mirkwood had to fight back an infestation of death-curse wasps. Influenced by the wasps’ venom, many of the victims hid away, making the excision of wasp larvae difficult. For over a year, there continued to be new attacks by wasps, leading to a death toll of over twenty elves.  
Since then, all citizens of the Kingdom of Mirkwood have been instructed about the symptoms of the sting of the Rachgûr Ercorhofal and negligence to report any incidents is punishable with lengthy incarcerations.


End file.
